"He's got the whole world in His hands. He's got the itty bitty baby in His hands. He's got a-you and me brother in His hands, He's got a-you and me sister in His hands."
This song recently became a reminder when I had a coffee with a friend of mine. She was expressing all of her stress and worries about being a single mother. I cannot begin to imagine what its like to be a single parent, let alone being a single mother.
"Hayden, I feel like everything I am doing is wrong. I feel like a horrible mother, I'm tired of fighting for custody with him." She started to tear up, " I feel like I just can't win, or catch a break." she began to cry. I wonder how many single mothers and fathers can relate to my friend's pain. I am sure they can. As a writer, I feel like I communicate better by writing, then by actually letting the words fall out of my mouth. I sat there in silence as she was crying, and I don't believe she actually wanted me to say anything, she just wanted me there to listen. All I could do was hug her. Single mothers and fathers, you have a tough road ahead, but I want you to know you are not alone. Do you know how I know this? because the bible clearly states in Deuteronomy 31:6 "Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid or terrified because of them, for the Lord your God goes with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you.” Here are some of the ways God holds you.
1. God holds you when your heart is broken
I know fighting over custody for your child can be brutal. Depending on your relationship with your ex, I know hurtful things can be said. I know it may not have worked out between you and your significant other, but there is a history between you two, and now that its over, it can still hurt. God knows how you are feeling. He knows you are upset and hurting. This is what he says to his children in Isaiah. "For I am the LORD your God who takes hold of your right hand and says to you, Do not fear; I will help you." Isaiah 41:13
2. God holds you when fear strikes
The fear must be great when raising a little one, especially when you are doing it by yourself. You are in constant worry about your child. What if they have an allergic reaction to the dog? What if they start running a fever in the middle of the night? What if they fall and hurt themselves? These are constant fears and worries that you deal with daily. You may feel like you have to deal with these fears by yourself, but the fact is is that you don't. My God has given you peace, “Peace is what I leave with you; it is my own peace that I give you. I do not give it as the world does. Do not be worried and upset; do not be afraid.” John 14:27
3. God Holds you when you are lonely
You're single. You're not just single, but you are a single parent. You may feel like you will never find anyone to love you and your child. Dating may seem hopeless and pointless. You may feel unloved. I want you to know that my God loves you. He has you in his hand. He has a love for you that is so great, that your mind cannot imagine. Single mothers and single fathers, you are loved! My God has not given up on you, nor has he left you. His love for you grows daily. “No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us. For I am sure that neither death nor life, nor angels nor rulers, nor things present nor things to come, nor powers, nor height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God in Christ Jesus our Lord." Romans 8:37-39
But God, being rich in mercy, because of the great love with which he loved us, even when we were dead in our trespasses, made us alive together with Christ— by grace, you have been saved.
Single mothers, you are not alone. You are loved. You are cherished. You are valued. You are appreciated. Don't give in to the fear, the sadness, or the loneliness. My God is with you.