Let’s face it: if you are reading this, you know you are boy crazy, and just can’t admit it.
All of your friends know it, you know it but are in denial. It is more than okay to be obsessed with the male species, it is all a part of life. However, this funny obsession may end up backfiring to come across as crazy, or creepy, which will scare off the boy you may be obsessed with.
So if you match up with more than a couple, or even all or more than these common signs, you may want to be more discrete, or take a break from the boys.
1. You can't keep all of your sheep in a herd
Nobody can keep track of all your men, not even yourself. Your friends do not know who you are referring to half of the time when you have conversations about boys because there are just way too many. This is a true test to see which friends are true because this is a pain.
2. You have become a stalker
Call up the FBI and ask to start training because stalking is your forte.You know where your crush is at all times, schedule and everything there is to know about him. Google is your friend, you know where he lives, family, pets, sports stats and heck you probably Google Mapped and Zillow his house for all we know along with his parents’ annual income. The Instagram “following tab” is a nightmare in disguise because this is where you see him “cheat on you” by liking other girls’ pictures. A pure tragedy. You have become so good at stalking, you may as well start a business out of it.
3. Boys are all you talk about
Sure, all teenage girls talk about boys, but you make boy talk your specialty. It’s not just a side conversation, it is hours worth of phone calls and face time calls about your new boy toy, and the latest update and gossip. Yet another reason to add to the “Why my friends really must love me” list.
4. Snapchat map is your holy grail
When Snapchat updated to Snap map, this was the highlight of your summer. Now you can know where your crush is basically at all times. Oh, and not to mention who he is with. This is a good thing and a bad thing. It is a good thing in a sense that you have the security of knowing he is not with hoes, and hopefully rather with the bros. And if you are in a relationship and see your man with another girl, this can be a problem. But do not worry, Snap map can glitch sometimes, and everything can be one big misunderstanding. Be sure to have backup sources before making a fuss.
5. You plan your schedule based on boys
Ranging from changing your everyday walking schedule just to pass your boy, or even to something extreme as changing your classes or even major, just to be with cute boys. Now you can just so happen to bump into them.
6. Code names
A girl’s worst nightmare- having someone overhear your latest gossip about your man, whether is himself, his friends or another girl who can snitch after overhearing. This is why code names are put to work. Nobody will know who “Peter Pan” is or “church boy”. This is a great way to stay clear of potentially awkward situations.
7. A walk across campus is no walk in the park
With your luck, you somehow manage to be connected to almost every boy you see and are always trying to avoid that awkward eye-contact. Whether it’s a boy you have hooked up with, had a thing with, someone you have rejected or just someone you do not talk to anymore, take cover! A gazelle walking through a savannah of lions is the equivalent to you and these boys.
8. Five minutes is five years
Read receipts are the scariest thing known to man. It has been five minutes since your text or Snapchat has been opened, and no reply. The world is going to end, cue the zombie apocalypse now. You tell your friends it’s over. He must “hate” you or think you are not “good enough” and you” hate” him now. But then again he’s most likely just playing Fortnite, you know you love him again when he hits you with that reply an hour later. Everything is okay again... You respond right away, can't even do the ten-minute rule because you've been deprived for too long.
9. You want commitment way too soon
The Snapchat stage has just begun, and with that seven-day streak, you have convinced yourself that he’s the one. I mean, this perfect week of seeing each other’s faces for ten seconds about 30 times per day is full credibility that you both are perfect for each other.. Am I right? When you reach mutual best friends on the best friends list you might want to start booking the wedding. Facetime calls will happen in the marriage phase.
10. Jealous much?
The worst phase of them all... Jealousy. When seeing your crush talking to another girl, you can feel your heart sinking to the ground. You find yourself walking around campus in the state of depression listening to "Chasing Cars" by Snow Patrol as if you’ll never ever find a boy as cute, smart and charismatic ever again. Whip out the Ben and Jerry's ice cream and Nicholas Sparks movies because it's time to be forever alone. Until... you get a Snapchat from a new cute boy.
