Ah, Siblings Day. The day that every person on Facebook, Instagram, and Snapchat share cute photos with their brothers and sisters, talking about all the good memories and how grateful they are for their siblings.
If you're one of the people who posted something for today, that's awesome, all the power to you. I made a post several years ago too - I shared a candid of my sister and I sleeping in the car and made sure she knew I loved her. To post about family and your appreciation for them is totally great, I get that.
However, there are some of us who don't want to post on Siblings Day. We don't want to have to pretend to be thrilled with our sibling when we aren't, and frankly, it's kind of sad to see all of the happy posts others make that we can't.
My sister and I have a strained relationship, to say the least. Over the years, she has done some incredibly questionable, toxic, and hurtful things to both me and my parents. That being said, we always forgave her and tried to look past the bad, since she is family after all. Even being eight years older than me, almost nine, I always made sure to look out for her and help her when she needed it. That's what sisters do.
The past couple years, though, things have gotten increasingly worse. The ways she treated my parents became almost abusive, and, despite everything we did for her, her problems were ultimately our fault. No matter how many times I helped her stumble to bed, made sure she was hydrated, and essentially made sure she would be able to make it through the night, it was never quite enough.
Eventually, enough is enough. I couldn't bear to just sit back and watch as someone close to me's life fell apart... so I didn't.
I stepped away, and haven't spoken to my sister in months.
While she may be "family" and it may be my obligation to be there for her, it is also my obligation to be there for myself and make sure I'm okay. I can't do that if I'm not even sleeping to make sure she is and making myself an anxious mess just so she can blow up and send me into a panic attack.
If you're like me, I want you to know that it's okay to not be thrilled about Siblings Day.
It's okay to not want to post or see posts or get angry because chances are, you have a right to be. You have a right to want to put yourself first and distance yourself from anyone who keeps you from doing that. Regardless of circumstances, Siblings Day is a day that, just like Mother's or Father's Day, can be incredibly hard. Don't feel obligated to celebrate, because you aren't.
To my sister, will I always love you? Of course, you're family. But do I have to be in your life? Not really. I hope you're doing okay and that you're keeping an eye out for yourself, but I'm sorry. I won't be making a Siblings Day post this year.
