Let’s talk about sex. Well, why not? In this day and age sex has received so much negativity, particularly from parents who talk to their children about avoiding sex until marriage. What is it about sex that makes parents drill into their children’s brains that they should wait to have sex? Is it religious values?

As someone who was raised in a Christian household that did not condone having sex until marriage, I understand where parents who do not wish for their children to have sex until they have tied the knot are coming from. At the same time, however, what is it about sex that makes many parents find it necessary to discourage teens and young adults from doing the deed?

On the night of my high school formal the faculty had to check everyone’s coat pockets and purses before going inside the school gym. This one girl was wearing her date’s jacket and when the teacher checked the pockets, she found a condom in the coat. What did the teacher do? She threw the condom away! As if that was going to prevent the two students from having sex, later. While that teacher intended to prevent this couple from having sex, the teacher didn’t throw away the opportunity for sex, she threw away protection with the thought that it always encouraged sex.

Parents are so opposed to unmarried individuals having sex, either at a young age or before marriage, but when parents and other adult figures aren’t around, sex happens. As long as the two individuals are being safe and are aware of one another’s boundaries, why give sex so much negativity and disapproval?

Religion is very important in many people’s lives, and so I can respect those who believe in the notion of no sex before marriage. You don’t have to be religious to follow this belief, and you can choose to not follow this belief even if you are religious. It works both ways, in my opinion. If you are one of those people who chooses to have sex, what’s important is protection.

Protection, protection, protection. Did I say “protection?” I believe that a prominent reason why parents discourage sex so strongly is due to the consequences. How financially stable were you when you were fifteen? Stable enough to raise a baby? How mature were you? If you’re having a baby, I sure hope you have your life put together because I can’t imagine how difficult it would be to raise a child before figuring out who I really am as a person and what I want to do with my life. If you can’t take care of yourself, then how can you take care of a baby, another life? This is something that parents want their children to avoid until the children are older and married because more than likely a teenager or young adult is not ready for the responsibility that comes with raising a kid.

While having sex, protection is important to avoid unplanned pregnancies, and to avoid sexually transmitted diseases. Sex is meant to be recreational. It’s meant to be fun. But it probably isn’t much fun when that pregnancy test or HIV test comes out positive. For these two reason I understand why parents, such as mine, discourage sex, but consequences like these tend to come from not being smart or careful. If you’re a normal teenager or young adult, from time to time you probably want to do the opposite of what you are told. Parents should know this, and so instead of discouraging sex, how about encouraging protection, like condoms and birth control?

Consequences come to those who are either unprepared, or think that they are invincible, and so schools teach about sex education so those who decide to have sex are knowledgeable on the ways to avoid those consequences. The reasons why people discourage sex are understandable, but talk about sex doesn’t need be so negative. You are not invincible, but that doesn’t mean you aren’t careful. If parents opposed to sex before marriage, like mine, took into consideration how smart their children can be, maybe they will see that sex does not deserve to be in such a bad light.