I will graduate college. I will have a job lined up post-grad. I will make a lot of money. I will find the love of my life like the fairytales told me I would. I will have the toned body like the Lululemon ads show.

All of this is possible. All of these goals are realistic. These are the kind of thoughts that make life exciting and worth waiting for. But, these are also the thoughts that make me lose sleep every night, overthink everyday, and question what I do every single moment.

I have this way of imagining realistic scenarios in my head that get me overly excited for the future. Honestly, this isn't that bad of a way to look at life. I feel as though I am a positive person, I surround myself with people that I believe have the right intentions, and I think I am pretty good at reading the room. However, I set extremely high expectations for these kind of people and these kind of situations.

I imagine the best outcome. I look forward to the weekends. I look forward to hanging out with new people. I look forward to special events. I look forward to A LOT of things. Why? Well, what if I meet a boy? What if we hang out all night? What if he thinks I'm cute? What if he's really nice, like GENUINELY nice? What if he's not a hoe? What if he's THE ONE?

Well, hate to break it to you honey, but the boy who's blackout at the frat party that probably was getting with one of your sorority sisters last weekend PROBABLY isn't the one that's going to be waiting at the end of the aisle for you on your wedding day.

Yes, call me crazy. But, I am a girl and all of us are a little crazy.

The reason I set these expectations is because I always put 100% of my effort into everything I do. Since that's the case, I assume that other people will do the same. If I am working on a group project for a class, I know I am going to do my section of the project ahead of time, making sure it is thoroughly completed and not missing any detail. Although I did my work, that does not mean that another group member won't wait until minutes before the project is due at 11:59 PM to start their section. Things like this drive me crazy. If I completed my part of the project so early, why couldn't you? I mean, I'm a busy person and I got it done so what have you been doing? I'm pretty darn perfect, so why is it so hard for you to not be so stupid?

Hopefully you understand my sarcasm, but the annoyance is still very VERY real.

I get myself so worked up sometimes. I try to practice living in the moment, but I know I get caught up in the future. Will I land my dream job? Will I graduate on time? Will I still be best friends with my freshmen year roommates in 10 years? Will I change my major? Will I end up HATING my life post grad?

It's not a bad thing to be thinking about the future. In fact, it's very normal and very healthy to be thinking about the future. It keeps your life realistic, holds you accountable, and helps build a positive mindset. However, having such high expectations of yourself and other situations can become very daunting.

I'll use my thoughts as an example. Let's say I meet a boy (and God forbid he's a cute boy) and this boy starts talking to me at a party. He seems very friendly and actually, he's kind of funny. In my head I'm thinking, "Is he flirting or is he just being nice? Is he just drunk or is he genuinely interested in talking to me? Is he only talking to me so he can find someone to go home with at the end of the night?"

All of the sudden, he walks away and continues on with his night. Maybe I got his Snapchat during our conversation. The night goes on and I forget about it. The next morning? You best believe I'm sitting at the cafe with my friends talking about the boy from the night before. We start coming up with the "what ifs." All of the "what ifs" of the mystery man at the frat party.

Is coming up with all of these "what ifs" fun? Absolutely. It's EXCITING. Setting high expectations over a situation that probably won't ever happen? SIGN ME UP.

The point of explaining all of this is that setting high expectations can be emotionally and physically draining. When these dream situations don't happen or other people don't cooperate like how I thought they would, I don't get mad at the people. All of my fantasies are out of their control. I get very frustrated at MYSELF. I give myself the hardest time asking, "Why did you do this? Why did you think they would like you back? Why did you think up this situation? You are so dumb. You are so ridiculous. You are being unrealistic."

Actually, I'm not being unrealistic. And that's the problem.

I'm actually quite realistic and that's what makes the feeling of disappointment so much worse. I hate the feeling of being let down and I find that with setting high expectations, that feeling is reoccurring. It makes me feel like I can't get TOO excited for the future because of all of the possible "what ifs." Not to be negative, but sometimes it's hard being positive.

On the flip side, setting high expectations is a good thing. It proves that you know what you are worth and you know what you deserve. Personally, it helps me become more confident and self-aware of my actions. Having this kind of confidence and high standards might come across as intimidating (at least that's what I've been told). It makes people "fear" getting in your way and messing you up because of the reaction they might get in return.

As someone that doesn't hand out second chances like playing cards, I am very familiar with letting people go. I don't let people dwell on me because I know what I deserve and the one thing I KNOW I don't deserve is a big load of bullcrap from anybody. I know I don't deserve this because of the high expectations I have for others and myself.

Overall, setting high expectations is both good and bad. It makes me want to scream out of excitement and sit and cry in my bed all day. It's a very confusing love-hate relationship. You know, kind of similar to the non-existent relationship I have with the mystery man at the frat party.

Yes, I know I sound like a psycho. But I know I am not the only one that thinks like this. In fact, a LOT of people think like this and they are just afraid to say it. So here I am writing about it and putting it on the Internet. Classic.

All in all, keep setting those high expectations. You know your values, you know your worth, and you know what you deserve from others. However, it is okay to cry about it sometimes too.