On Saturday, with tears in my eyes, I watched some of my very best friends cross the stage and receive their diplomas, transitioning out of their lives as an undergrad student. There they stood, an oak sapling in hand and the rest of their lives ahead of them. Too many thoughts crossed my mind as each friend's name was called. "What the hell would I do without some of these people? Campus just won't be the same. They have so much going for them. Holy crap, that will be me next year."
It hit me. I have two semesters left at my favorite place, with some of my favorite people. I have one year left of taking cool undergrad classes, playing club soccer, going out on a Tuesday night for no reason while receiving no judgment and being a few feet down the street from my best friends. I've always had difficulty conceptualizing time passing by, and it seems as if the more I attempt to understand it, the quicker it passes.
It feels like yesterday that I pulled out of my driveway, my life packed into our Honda Pilot, anxious about my college journey. I cried for days before we left, so scared of the unknown and saying goodbye to my parents after move-in was one of the hardest things I've ever done. To be honest, I still get teary eyed thinking about it, but when I look at how that one week of homesickness transformed into excitement and hunger to seize every opportunity this campus has to offer, my life changed for the better. I for one had the most incredible roommate to love and support me through my difficult moments, celebrate my accomplishments and break me out of my shell. I found some of my closest friends on the first night of club soccer practice, feeling so welcomed and supported by people I knew for approximately an hour and a half. I found my home in a sorority that celebrates the person I am while pushing me to be the best person I can be. On move out day, my dad laughed as I wiped away tears, reminding me how nervous I was to leave home and look how far I've come.
Each year has brought something incredibly different and exciting to the table. Freshman year it was discovering who exactly I wanted to be and finding the friends who are there through it all. Sophomore year brought leading a group of freshman during orientation, anxious and nervous, just as I was a year prior. It yielded philanthropy opportunities, a study abroad trip of a lifetime, and a slew of amazing humans that I was newly introduced to. Junior year brought maturity and comfort with who I was and what I wanted and needed in my life. Hard times came when I realized who would be around in my life for the long haul and who was just there temporarily. The wonderful thing was the opportunities never dwindled to have amazing experiences or meet new people to experience those moments with, and as I stare my final year of college straight in the face, I am confident that senior year will bring forth even more incredible moments.
I'm a sentimental human. I'm the type of person who will cry at a graduation where I know nobody graduating, simply because my heart empathizes with their journey and where they may be headed next. Although I am filled with emotions, I know I love with my full heart and find meaning in every situation. Time passing by is simply inevitable, and although that absolutely scares the crap out of me, I have no choice left but to embrace it. This wonderful place can only be my physical home for four years (unless I fail a class next year so I can't graduate, which I am strongly considering), but I know it is home forever. Each and every moment here has made me grow into the confident, loving, and supportive person I would like to think I am. Each and every human I have encountered on this campus has shaped me in some way.
There is so much more to come in these next two semesters, and while my stomach turns at the thought of myself in the maroon and gold cap and gown, walking across the stage to receive my diploma and oak sapling this time next year, I will take a deep breath and embrace it. There is no sense of worrying about what time will bring to me in the future, for it will not change the outcome. To my friends graduating this year, I hope you know how proud I am of you and how grateful I am for you and your friendship. The rest of your life is waiting for you and you have such an incredible foundation to build upon after attending this institution.
Senior year, I may not be ready for you, but I welcome you with open arms as you help me grow in more ways than one because I vow to make the most of every moment so I can wear the biggest smile on graduation day, knowing my college experience was exactly what I wanted it to be.
