For months I told myself that I was so ready to graduate. The thought of being able to go out into the real world and do absolutely anything that I wanted was something that has always excited me. I told myself that I was so ready for what was to come and that I was "so over" this current chapter of my life.
My very last semester hit and my entire mindframe completely flipped. The thought of leaving the place that I referred to as "home" for the past four years started to terrify me. Realizing that I would be soon separated from the many friends that have became the very closet people to me was absolutely devastating. I suddenly no longer wanted to pack up my things and move onto bigger and better things. Exactly where I was at seemed like more than enough.
As my last semester began, I found myself doing many "lasts". My last first day of classes. My last Saint Patrick's Day on campus. My very last Formal, and so on. I watched myself and my outlook on my last few months completely transform.
I started to no longer really care about doing the things that everyone else wanted me to do, and only doing the things that truly made me happy. I was suddenly on a strict schedule to do absolutely anything and everything that made me happy in the little amount of time that I had left to enjoy it. It no longer made any sense to me to waste a single second of my time left in college doing something that I didn't fully and truly wanted. Every single second seemed so precious and it was my goal to make sure that each and everyone was completely enjoyed.
Time to myself was something of the past. I spent a majority of my time surrounded around the people who I have grown to love and have gained a special place in my heart. Everything that my college town had to offer, I wanted to do it all. And if I already did it, I had to do it again, one last time. My last semester suddenly became the most fun and enjoyable time of my college career and I finally seemed to be so happy enjoying every last second of it. The thought of "why didn't I start this sooner?" was something I said to myself almost daily.
I have learned that it is OK to be just a little selfish your last semester as a college senior. It is important to put yourself and the things that you want first in order to fully embrace the last few months of your time in a place that you will most likely never get to experience ever again. You're allowed to take the time to spend every single second with the friends that you will soon live hundreds of miles apart from. It is OK to dedicate a certain time in your life to yourself and embrace every single second of it.
