Everyone assumes that freshman year of college is the year you realize who you want to be, what you want to do, what makes you happy, etc. Honestly, that is the truth. It’s the beginning to the rest of your life. I would have classified myself as the girl who knew what she wanted from the minute she stepped into high school. I knew that I wanted to go to college to pursue a degree. I knew I wanted to make a bright future for myself and I knew I wanted to have a new beginning. I thought for sure I knew who I was, but I was wrong.
When I first came to college I was so excited to meet new people, to thrive in a new environment, to have a fresh start, to move on past the high school me. I thought for sure the person I had built myself to be the summer prior to the start of college was exactly who I was meant to be, but then I learned — it wasn’t. You may hear the phrase “college changes people” more often than you would like, but it’s not true. I mean, yeah, college breaks people out of their shells or sometimes they even join a new friend group, but that doesn’t mean it changes them as a person. It means they found who they wanted to be. Maybe the person they were before was just a show they put on for the people around them in high school. Moving on from the past during college allows people to realize that what they want for themselves is more important than what the people around want for them. Your freshman year in college should be the time to “do you”. Don’t worry whether or not you have a boyfriend/girlfriend or if you’re like the other girls/boys. You don’t need other people’s approval to be happy.
My first semester I focused way too much on boys and the past me that I never got the full “college experience.” My roommate and I were best friends, but we only hung out with each other. We never went out. I went home almost every weekend. It wasn’t until after Thanksgiving break that I realized I needed to make myself happy, not other people. Focusing all of my energy on what I thought I wanted only took away from what I truly needed. Because of that, I hated college. I hated school. I wanted to be back in high school. And then it hit me. College was going to be what I made it. Once I started going out more and socializing second semester, I loved school. I made a ton of new friends, I was never bored. I even realized that college wasn’t the time to “shop” for a boyfriend. It made me realize I don’t need other people to make myself happy. Happiness is something that comes from yourself, not another person. It wasn’t the time to make other people happy. It’s the time to be me. To find me. To become the best me possible. People don’t necessarily change because of college. They change because they realize that who they were in the past, was not truly who they wanted to be. It just took a new beginning for they to know it.
My advice to you is to not be afraid to try new things your first year in college. You might even find something new you like. People in college are completely different than high school. I came from a small school of only about 260 in my high school. Almost everyone loved country music and the only time you would really hear rap or pop music was when you went out to a party. College showed me how much different people from all over the state were and that just because someone wasn’t like me doesn’t mean we wouldn’t get along. My mom continuously told me my first semester, “just because someone’s not like you, doesn’t mean you can’t be friends”. It’s safe to say she was right (like always). Go out of your comfort zone, try something new. Find you.
