Sometimes You Meet Your Best Friends When You Least Expect It

They Tell You That You'll Find Love When You're Least Expecting it, But The Same Works For Friendships

2nd time's the charm.


Everyone says that the people you meet in college will become your lifelong friends, and until I got here, I never knew how true that was. Not only have I been fortunate enough to find some of these people, but I have also been able to discover a second meaning to what I've commonly heard.

What people really mean when they say this is that the people you bond with at your university will basically become a second family.

Don't get me wrong, you meet friends during your high school years that you could end up being friends with for many years to come, but they're nothing like the bonds you create at college. You have to live with these friends, eat with them, study with them, go out with them, and deal with the difficulties of life with them.

You don't think about it at first, but because of all of this, the people you once called your friends, seem to become a bit more than that.

When I first came to school, I was off to a bit of a rough start. I wasn't bonding well with my roommates and found myself going home a decent amount throughout the first semester. To be honest, I just generally wasn't enjoying the first couple of months of my college experience.

Even though I struggled, I made it through till the end of my fall semester, but I wasn't looking forward to coming back to finish out the spring.

Arriving back on campus after winter break, I began to battle with myself over what to do to fix my unfortunate roommate situation, and after way too much consideration, I decided I needed a "new home" at college; I applied for a room change and soon after, switched dorm rooms.

I cannot thank me enough for this decision.

Upon getting approved to switch rooms, I decided to take a step outside of my comfort zone and move into a random room with two complete strangers. Obviously, because of this, I now found myself super nervous about how the rest of my freshman year would play out.

Having moved from a room where I honestly didn't feel welcome, I was completely shocked when my new roommates pulled me out of my room the first night and told me that they expected to form a close friendship with me and could hopefully provide me with a place that feels more at home.

From that night forward, I knew I had unknowingly found two girls that would become my college family. On top of that, I was soon introduced to their close friend who we basically have labeled as our fourth roommate.

The four of us have had many nights staying up late, having dance parties and singing obnoxiously loud (sorry to the room next to us if you've heard One Direction playing at 2 a.m.), discussing life issues way too late into the night, taking care of each other while we cry over how stressed we are because of school work or just life in general, and experiencing the ups and downs of college as a group of 4 confused girls.

Like I said before, I never understood the true meaning of what people were saying they would tell me college is where you form lifelong friendships. It wasn't until I met these three girls that I was able to understand that you actually do start to form a second family away from home.

2. Noah Centineo 

4. Avan Jogia 

8. Michael B. Jordan 

10.  Christiano Ronaldo 

11. Chris Evans 

12. Drake 

15. Big Sean 

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I'm The Girl Without A 'Friend Group'

And here's why I'm OK with it


Little things remind me all the time.

For example, I'll be sitting in the lounge with the people on my floor, just talking about how everyone's days went. Someone will turn to someone else and ask something along the lines of, "When are we going to so-and-so's place tonight?" Sometimes it'll even be, "Are you ready to go to so-and-so's place now? Okay, we'll see you later, Taylor!"

It's little things like that, little things that remind me I don't have a "friend group." And it's been like that forever. I don't have the same people to keep me company 24 hours of the day, the same people to do absolutely everything with, and the same people to cling to like glue. I don't have a whole cast of characters to entertain me and care for me and support me. Sometimes, especially when it feels obvious to me, not having a "friend group" makes me feel like a waste of space. If I don't have more friends than I can count, what's the point in trying to make friends at all?

I can tell you that there is a point. As a matter of fact, just because I don't have a close-knit clique doesn't mean I don't have any friends. The friends I have come from all different walks of life, some are from my town back home and some are from across the country. I've known some of my friends for years, and others I've only known for a few months. It doesn't really matter where they come from, though. What matters is that the friends I have all entertain me, care for me, and support me. Just because I'm not in that "friend group" with all of them together doesn't mean that we can't be friends to each other.

Still, I hate avoiding sticking myself in a box, and I'm not afraid to seek out friendships. I've noticed that a lot of the people I see who consider themselves to be in a "friend group" don't really venture outside the pack very often. I've never had a pack to venture outside of, so I don't mind reaching out to new people whenever.

I'm not going to lie, when I hear people talking about all the fun they're going to have with their "friend group" over the weekend, part of me wishes I could be included in something like that. I do sometimes want to have the personality type that allows me to mesh perfectly into a clique. I couldn't tell you what it is about me, but there is some part of me that just happens to function better one-on-one with people.

I hated it all my life up until very recently, and that's because I've finally learned that not having a "friend group" is never going to be the same as not having friends.

SEE ALSO: To The Girls Who Float Between Friend Groups

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Finding Your Niche In College Starts With Finding You

Attempting to be someone you are not for the sake of having company only hurts you in the long run.


Transitioning to college is hard enough, but trying to find a place where you feel "at home" can make this time even more stressful. Here are some tips on how to find that place/group of people that make you feel like sunshine.

I have always felt a little out of place wherever I went, but it wasn't until college that I realized that this feeling was so special and more people should capitalize on their differences rather than conforming to a certain mold. Transitioning to college and finding your place among so many people can be very overwhelming. The added stress of attempting to be someone you aren't for the sake of having company adds a whole other layer to this problem. The easiest thing for me to do in any situation like this is trying to make the setting a little smaller. One of the most obvious ways to do this on a college campus is by getting involved!

It is inevitable that within the first few weeks of the semester at any college, there will be an organization fair. This is a chance to scope out all that your school has to offer! Chances are there will be some type of group or club that lines up with your interests. Most college campuses have extracurricular opportunities ranging from social sororities and fraternities, professional ones, intermural sports, vocal groups, and so many more. You are more than likely going to find some type of organization that you can call home if you seek them out. Joining an organization is such an easy way to interact with people with similar interests. An interest can bring two completely different people together and create some beautiful friendships. It is situations like this where it is important to be your authentic self and mingle with those you share something with.

That being said, finding your place in college isn't always about being involved. Getting involved on campus is just one of the simplest ways to start. There are so many other opportunities on campus to meet people whether it be among others in your residence hall, people in your classes, or just people you find yourself stumbling upon! Finding people to spend your time with is easy; however, you should make it a point to surround yourself with people who bring you up.

Once you have a set group of people that you find yourself spending time with, it is important to pay attention to the way you feel when you're around them. If you find yourself feeling bad about yourself or get the impression that you need to change something in order to "fit in," chances are the people you're around are not the best for you or your self-esteem. It is important to surround yourself with people who allow you to feel comfortable in your own skin. That being said, you also want people who encourage you to make good decisions and help you reach your goals. People who encourage toxic behavior in your life might be fun in the short term, but in the grand scheme of things, you need to be surrounded by people with your best interest in mind. Essentially, surrounding yourself with people who influence you to be your best self is one of the best decisions you can make short and long term.

The key to all of this is being conscious of your own feelings and needs. Pay attention to who reaches out to you to hang out. Notice the ones who pay attention to you as you speak when it feels like no one is listening. More than anything, be conscious of who you're with and where you're at when you experience moments of pure happiness. Life is too short to waste your precious time on people who don't build you up. Wouldn't you rather spend your time with more moments of pure joy than self-hate? Start living for you!

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