I keep finding myself stuck in a loop of reminiscing. I focus too much on the memories from the past, rather than setting my sights on the future. I feel too sensitive, too lost, and too hurt all at the same time. So how do I deal with it?
I distract myself. Maybe this feels like a loophole to you, but to me, it's my key to forgetting. Whether it's music, art, schoolwork, or spending time with my friends; distraction is the best medicine for pain. I try to keep myself focused always. To me, empty time is waster time. My days are often spent cleaning my room, doing my school work or actively watching a show. I try to schedule all of my days to the minute. This may seem crazy to you, but to me, it keeps me happy. I like being busy. I love it, actually. My friends enjoy doing nothing, just laying and staring at the wall. Unfortunately for them, I push them to stay busy. Actively attending college events, going off campus to browse stores, or having movie nights in my dorm room.
I explained earlier that I often feel stuck in a loop. To get out of this loop, I not only distract myself, but I build a ladder. Building a ladder is taking your day step by step. You build your own path for the day and go at your own pace. While I try to distract myself and stay busy, it's not always possible. I deal with physical pain almost 24/7 due to chronic illness, and I sometimes have to slow myself down. Sometimes my ladder is very small, but it serves its purpose.
Don't try and focus on just the large tasks of the day, sometimes you just need to accomplish the small ones to get through the day.