To all of those who are currently in relationships and are super happy with your significant other, this is not a roast about you. In fact, if you are currently in a relationship, I am ecstatic for you, go out and live your life. However, if you are like me and are currently not in a relationship, that’s perfectly ok too. In a span of 3 months, I have discovered how much I have grown, thrived, and succeeded while being single. It finally clicked for me that being in a relationship is not a top priority, I have the rest of my life to worry about that. I need to take this time in my life to be worried about myself and not other people. I am my own top priority.
I entered college while in a relationship. For a little while, my relationship was going fine and I thought we were happy, for the most part. By the middle of the semester, that relationship ended. Of course, I was devastated at the time because I didn’t think that relationship was going to end anytime soon. However, I had so many other things to worry about between class, extracurriculars, babysitting, and my home life.
After my relationship ended, so many opportunities have risen because I had more time for myself. I was able to become more involved with school outside of academics (i.e. greek life, clubs, community service) and I reconnected with people that I have lost touch with because of being in a relationship.
I was offered a great opportunity to move out on my own for the summer, and I did a lot of self-reflection. Self-reflection was probably the best thing that I have ever done for myself. When I was dating my last boyfriend, I found myself focusing all of my energy on him and what makes him happy. I lost sight of what makes me happy and who I was as a person! There was a point where I was introducing myself as “so and so’s girlfriend” and not “Tori.” Word of advice, if you start to introduce yourself as someone’s significant other, get out of the relationship or reevaluate your priorities. You are a unique individual and you have so much to show for that. Never feel that introducing yourself as someone’s significant other would have more value than introducing yourself to people as yourself.
My parents were high school sweethearts, my brother is about to marry his high school sweetheart, and there are many other examples of high school sweethearts that I have encountered in my life. With that being said, I have felt pressure to seek out my “perfect match” or my “soulmate” at a young age. Since I haven’t, it lowered my self-confidence and I felt that maybe I wouldn't end up marrying someone. After a lot of soul-searching, I have found that I am so much happier being single and living my life.
Maybe one day I will find prince charming when I least expect it, but for right now, I am content being on my own and embarking on a journey of self-discovery. For all of the people who are in relationships, I am super excited for you because it is such a cool thing to find your person. For all of the people who are single, you are awesome, you rock, and you deserve all the self-love in the world. Never forget, relationships are not a top priority, you are.
