You are not a failure.
Speaking from personal experience, I have an incredibly hard time preventing myself from saying things like, "I'm a failure" or "No matter how hard I work it'll never be good enough."
Take it from me when I say, THIS IS NOT HEALTHY OR A GOOD WAY TO LIVE!
We always have constant reminders or things around us pointing out our flaws. Your looks are never good enough. You never have enough money. You never seem to be where you want to be professionally. Your grades aren't good enough. The list goes on and on and becomes more specific for each individual person.
You can become your own biggest critic and this can drain you.
On top of the self-criticism, you have to pile on the criticism you receive from your peers, your family, co-workers, etc. Again, increasingly straining you emotionally, physically and mentally.
I believe your family can ultimately be the worst at pointing out your mistakes or imperfections. They can devalue your worth, as they impose their visions for how you should be or how they "raised" you to be.
This can diminish your personal character and make your personal goals seem less obtainable because they might not add up to what your family wants you to accomplish.
So how do you work towards realizing your self-worth and preventing yourself from saying you're a failure?
1. I'm not where I want to be, but I'm ok
Although you might remind yourself of what you're not doing or where you are not, remind yourself of what you're grateful for. This could be reminding yourself that you have an amazing support system, you have shelter or food in your stomach, clothes to put on your back, or a chance to work towards what you're passionate about. At the end of the day, everyone has something they're thankful for.
2. Spend less time focusing on what you can't change/control
An important part of realizing you're not a failure is realizing not everything is in your control. Just because you didn't receive that position you wanted doesn't mean you're not good enough!
Realizing you tried your best can truly help with accepting your circumstances. As long as you know for certain that you tried your absolute best, that's all that ultimately matters. You can always try again!
Failure is never permanent.
3. "I might hate the feeling of failure, but I can handle it!"
As I said above, failure is never permanent! Doubting yourself makes the feeling of failure seem more real or worse. Think positively and cherish your abilities! Know you are worth it and are able!
Reminding yourself that you can handle failure change your perspective to become more positive and productive.
4. I'm not the only one who feels this way
Everyone experiences self-doubt and failure! Failure isn't always personal! Remind yourself that you're not the only person experiencing these negative thoughts and doubts, we all experience them!
This reminder can help you find a support system of individuals who can help bring you out of your funk. Cherish those people! They are placed in your life for a reason.
5. Failure can make me stronger
Failure is a part of life and will make you stronger. Every situation you go through, successful or not, will contribute towards your self-growth.
It's so important to realize that the worse the situation may seem, the greater the outcome will be after you overcome your thoughts of failure or self-doubt. Failure can make you realize that you can handle more than you ever imagined.
Listen to my positive bunny post below, you are never a failure! We are always continuously growing and the more we accept that, the less we become our own nightmare.