We all experience times when we are single, whether it's for a long time or not, we experience them. And most likely, a majority of people have been single when a lot of people they knew weren't; this is especially the case when you're in school. Now, for someone who has experienced quite a long time of this, I've noticed some advantages and disadvantages of being single when everyone around you is not.
One of the biggest things that I've come to realize is that it's so nice not having to be directly responsible for someone else's feelings. For instance, when your significant other (SO) comes to you and says 'I'm sad,' you then have to deal with that, which is something that I am not good at. So not having to deal with that at all is very nice.
In correlation with the point that I just stated, not having to be conscious of the fact that you are indeed in a relationship. What I mean by this is you don't have to worry about what another person is doing and a person is not worried about what you are doing. I don't know how many times I've heard or seen arguments my siblings or friends have had with their SO because one person didn't answer the phone like they said they would or someone said they saw them at a place they weren't supposed to be or they seemed a little too friendly towards someone, etc. Not having to worry about this leaves me open to do whatever I want with whoever I want.
Another benefit to being the only one single is that you get to know yourself really well, because you tend to start doing more and more things on your own. This is really important because you realize that you can take of yourself and make yourself happy on your own without being in a relationship. Which is really important to remember when you are in a relationship and not 100 percent satisfied.
However, sometimes it's nice to have someone to depend on for your happiness in certain situations and it's nice to have that close intimate bond with someone. When you see that constantly around you, you start to get jealous of that and wish you were in a relationship too. Until, drama starts and you thank God that you aren't in one.
In addition to feeling jealous of your couple friends, those couple friends decide you need a relationship too! How great. Personally, I've never had someone try to actively set me up, but friends have expressed their want to do so. Being single is sometimes your choice and sometimes it isn't, regardless of that, it's really infuriating when a friend decides that you need a relationship when sometimes you're cool with just being alone. It's annoying when someone thinks they know what's best for you, which is a lot of arguments I see in my friends' relationships.
This brings me to my next point: having to watch your friends be in relationships. This, in my opinion, is the absolute worst part about being single, because you are always the go-to person when your friends are having problems. This is a big problem for me, because I am really bad at dealing with other people's emotions, even though I feel really honored that you came to me with your problem. It also sucks because you can see a bad relationship, which is really hard to tell that person, because you don't want them angry at you. And you can't gloat when you're right. Many people I know were/are in bad relationships and even if you tell them, nothing is going to change because they can't see it. Watching your friends be in relationships also sucks, because you have to be around them. And being the third wheel gets really tiring really fast, almost to the point where you'd rather not do things with them.
Overall, being single when people you know aren't, is really fun. You get to do all the things they can't and can rub it in their faces. You also don't have to worry about what another person thinks or feels about you and you about them. However, sometimes you crave that close bond with someone, until fighting happens and you're glad you're single. I personally believe that being single is a valuable part of growing up, because you are able to find and know yourself a lot better than people that jump from relationship to relationship. That way when you find yourself in a relationship, you have a better idea of what you want from it.
