Here's an excerpt from a very common conversation I've had with friends (and one I'm sure many people out there can relate to):
Friend: "Hey! A bunch of us are going to (insert random place college kids go) tonight! Why don't you come along with us?
Me: "Oh, thanks for offering, but I've got a lot of work due tomorrow that I need to work on."
Friend: "But tomorrow's Sunday, why would you have to turn in-"
Me: "Oh wow look at the time I should really get going but thanks for inviting me to the thing now go have fun!"
End excerpt. Alright, every conversation doesn't go like that, but people ask me to hang out, and a lot of times I say I've got 'work to do'. This might come as a shocker, but--there's no work to do and I'm just a terrible person who lies.
But if we're being serious, I'm not a terrible person, I promise. I also don't hate you, or don't want to be your friend, or think you're weird or any other negative thing just because I deny your invitations again and again. Chances are, I think you're wonderful. So, there should be no issue, and everything should be rainbows and daisy's while chocolate falls from the sky.
But there is no chocolate falling, so therefore there is an issue.
Honestly, I just get tired of being around people. Not in a bad way--my mind just gets tired! Not everyone can relate to that I bet, so if you're a social butterfly, you need to understand that a lot of people don't thrive off of talking to people and being around people.
On the contrary! I thrive off being alone and recharging myself in preparation for the next time I need to be around people, or want to hang out with people. I'm not a grump who hates people and tries to avoid them, I actually love all my friends and the chances I get to hang with them. When I get in a mood, though, where my body is just tired and my mind can't cope with all the social interaction, trust me when I say that you're going to want me to deny you request to hang out.
I feel like there is a social stigma about this situation. You can't just nicely tell someone, "Oh, I don't want to hang out because I'm tired of people right now." It just sounds bad, even if you don't mean for it to sound bad. People are expected to make the most of everything and sacrifice time to themselves for time with other people. In a perfect world, it'd be great if we could constantly be around people and never get tired, but nothing is perfect.
So, please, if I, or anyone else, tells you that they don't want to hang out because they need relaxation time, try to understand! It doesn't mean we hate you, it just means that we need to put ourselves first sometimes! Let's end the expectation that we need to be on the go 24/7, and spend some time by ourselves if we need it.
