Before I begin, I’d like to preface this by letting you know that it is Friday night and I’m writing this article in my comfiest pajamas, with my hair up in the messiest of messy buns. Oh, and I’m 23 years old and totally fine with the fact that I’m not out drinking right now. But, I definitely haven’t always been this way.
Before college, I was the quintessential homebody. If you looked up the word “hermit” in the dictionary, I'm sure you would have found my picture next to it. While my friends were out partying in high school, I would enjoy going home and being alone. I felt like I was around those people all day, and just needed a break. It’s not that I didn’t like to have fun, but I didn’t feel like I needed to go out every single weekend to be happy with my life. However, once I got to college that idea seemed to change. I joined a sorority, and quickly got caught up in the fast-paced world of college life, which was every Thursday, Friday and Saturday night. It seemed like there was a different party all the time. After a while, all of my weekends blurred together and I couldn’t decipher one from the other.
This was a new world for me.
I very quickly went from the girl that turned down party invites, to the girl that was doing the inviting. The idea of staying in on a weekend when I was 20 years old seemed ridiculous. I mean, why stay in when everyone else was out having fun? I guess that I didn’t want to feel left out. The worst part is that by Monday, I was already asking people what we were doing Thursday night. I would make sure that I had something lined up, because it was a legitimate fear that I would get to the weekend and not have something to do. As long as I was keeping occupied, I thought that I was happy. And I kept that mentality for a long time. But eventually a weekend came where all of my friends were busy or out of town and I had no choice but to stay in. I thought that I would be miserable and was embarrassed that I was spending a Friday night in bed watching a movie. But then I realized how nice it was to just relax and be alone again. I remembered how awesome it was to spend some time by myself, and started to wonder why I didn’t do it more often.
When did it become embarrassing to be in your 20s and not want to go out all the time? Why is it that we feel pity for our friends when we ask them what they’re doing this weekend and their answer is “nothing”?
Just because I like to relax and stay in every once in a while doesn’t mean that I never have fun. I still go out and go to parties – in fact, I went out with a group of friends last weekend, and the weekend before that. But, I’m also OK with staying in by myself, like right now. And honestly, I feel good about it. Just because we’re young, doesn’t mean that we should feel pressured to live the ideal “young” life. Spending time alone is healthy and recharges your mental batteries for the nights that you do choose to go out. I’ve managed to find my in-between since high school, and so should you.
By all means, have those crazy, unexpected nights that you should probably only have when you’re this age. Make those decisions that you laugh about years later with your friends, and have those weekends that you know you’ll always remember. But also make sure that you’re alright with having the nights staying in. And feel comfortable telling people that you don’t feel like going out some weekends. Don’t spend time wallowing in the fact that you’re alone if your friends are too busy to hang out. Instead, make the most of your time with yourself. Put on your favorite Netflix show, start a new book, watch a new movie or even write an article in bed. Whatever you choose to do with your time, make the most of it. But most importantly, know that there will always be another weekend.
