In my English class this past semester, our theme was monsters. For our research paper we had to pick something we saw as a monster and write about it, I chose rape culture. With the recent events at Stanford university, I decided to share a shorter version of my final paper. Rape culture is very real and it will continue grow and become a vicious monster unless we stop it.
What exactly is rape culture? In the simplest of terms, rape culture is victim blaming, it is the way the media sexualizes women, it is saying “boys will be boys,” but never coming to the rescue of young girls. Rape culture is when we ignore the sexual abuse and assault of men, because "it never really happens to them." Rape culture is a monster that has been hiding under society's bed for so long, but people are now bringing it out into the light.
Rape culture runs rampant in the media. I'm sure most of you remember the case of the two high school football players from Steubenville, OH who posted the video of a 16 year old girl they raped. The media was so focused on the lives of the young men that it really didn't matter that not only was this young girl raped, but people could watch a video of these boys violating her. There was outcry about how the two boys had lost their chances of being professional football players, as if sports are more important than the safety of our women... But in a society that is overrun by rape culture, the future of athletes do seem to be more important than the safety of women.
One in four women on college campuses will be sexually assaulted and many will never come forward. Rape culture is a monster, not because it parades its victims down the street, but because it silences its victims. I've had too many girls tell me of things that have happened to them in the past, but they were too scared or embarrassed to report what happened to them. They watch how the media handles rape victims and they see that rapists often don't get the punishment they deserve.
All too often we ask "What was she wearing?" "Did she drink too much?" "How can we be sure she just isn't trying to cover up a mistake?" instead of asking "Why did this person think it was okay to sexually assault someone?" and that's what is wrong with the world today. People excuse rapists and automatically jump to attack victims. The New York Times interviewed the neighbors of an 11 year old girl who was raped and one of them blamed her rape on the fact that she dressed a little older and hung out with people who were not her age. Here's the thing, none of that changes the fact that she was just 11 years old. Rape and sexual assault are never and will never be the at the fault of the victim.
If we stop victim blaming, if we stop saying that “boys will be boys,” and stop feeling sympathy for rapists, we can bring an end to rape culture. This culture of slut-shaming, victim blaming, and silencing is no longer able to be kept in the dark. I hope for a world in which one day I can go out and feel safe in what I am wearing and do not have to worry about being taken advantage of by someone because of how much I have had to drink. I dream of a world where young girls are not blamed for their rapes because they dress too provocative or act older than their age. I hope that we implement education for elementary kids and we raise a generation of boys who have learned not to rape, instead of girls who have learned not to get raped. I hope that one day "no means no" and that no response certainly does not mean yes.
Rape culture is a monster that dehumanizes and demoralizes. Rape culture makes victims feel like they could have prevented their rape if they had just done something different. Monsters scare us, and rape culture scares people into silence, it scares people into making themselves and their problems smaller. Rape culture cannot survive without people there to feed it every day. The ending of rape culture begins with me and you and everyone else. This monster can be killed. This monster must be killed.
