I want friends who I can do life with. What do I mean by that? I want consistent friends who I know I can rely on for my entire life. Realistically, I know we will not always be as close as we originally were, but it is still nice to be able to know that I can call someone at the drop of a hat and they will be there for me. Friendship works both ways. Whatever qualities I expect out of my friends, I also try to reciprocate. Here are some qualities that I think a good friend has and that I also try to have.
A good friend is a friend who listens and understands the limits of their friend. It is hard to have a friendship with someone who only talks about themselves. It is OK to rant to your friends, but you should also take time to let them to rant to you. Find your balance. When you start becoming a friend who listens you in turn become a friend who understands. As a friendship deepens, you start to understand more about each other. You understand when a person has reached their limit or is uncomfortable by a situation because you are able to read their body language and facial features like you would your own.
A good friend is someone who is honest and real with you. To me, one of the most important things I can have in a friendship is honesty. We need to be honest in not only in our actions, but also in our advice. If a friend asks an opinion about what they are wearing, please be honest with them. It only hurts more in the long run if you continue to try to protect their feelings. You also need to be honest with your friends about your life. You cannot have real connections with people if all you do is put up walls and have on your everything is OK mask. It is OK to be vulnerable if it means you receive a lifetime friendship built on trust and honesty.
A good friend sticks with you in the seasons of trouble and the seasons of laughter. It is important to have friends who stay with you even on your bad days and in the times where you are not so sure of yourself. It makes the times of laughter sweeter if you have been with a person through their troubling times.
A good friend grows with you as your friendship grows. Your friendship will change over the years as you and your friend change. With the growth of your friendship it is also important to find friends who are willing to pray for you. You need friends who will pray for you each day and not just when you have a specific prayer request because you are in a season of doubt or trouble. You also need to have good friends who you can call on when you do need specific prayer because you know they will actually pray for you instead of saying they will pray for you as an empty promise with no action.
A good friend might not have every one of these qualities down to an exact science, but neither do I. These are all qualities we can strive to when thinking about how to be a better friend to those around us.
