I grew up being the middle child with an older sister and a younger brother. My sister was the first grandchild in our family, so by default, everyone was attached to her. I was the next born into the family, and since I was the second girl I wasn’t a big deal to anyone. My brother was the third born, and my dad favored him because he was the only boy. I thought that was just a phase that would soon wear off but here I am, 20 years old, and I am still treated as the black sheep of the family.

If you are a middle child, you know there have been many downs to being the middle child, but there has also been a handful of ups, as well.

I am more independent than my other siblings. My siblings would get money handed to them without asking because they were more loved than I was, and I always felt guilty having to ask for a few dollars. Because of that, I fended for myself, got a job when I was old enough, and worked for what I wanted. I would rather struggle and go without rather than asking for money.

I want attention, because I never got it from my parents or grandparents, but as soon as someone gives me the slightest bit of attention I turn it down. I don’t want attention anymore because I am so used to going without it, that I don’t know how to accept it.

I am a fighter and very competitive. I grew up horse playing with my siblings and sometimes that lead to fist fighting because we were so mad at each other and we would never stop until someone came and broke it up. I am great at arguing, too. This has made me a stronger person mentally and physically. I am physically stronger because I had to be to defend myself when I would argue/fight with my siblings. This has also made me mentally stronger, because I know what I want and I will not give up until I get it.

I will always have someone to go to for advice and someone to give advice to when needed. Having an older sister means that she’s already been through all the things that I am going through so I can go to her when I need help getting through a situation. And my brother can always come to me for advice when he needs help.

I get blamed for everything. No matter who did it, I was always the one to get blamed for it. The excuse my dad would always give was the standard, “Your sister is old enough to know better, and your brother is too young to understand.” Eventually I just gave in and excepted the blame, because I didn’t have a choice. I knew that I did not do it, and I knew that I would always seek my revenge later.

Because I always got blamed, I had stricter rules than my siblings. My sister was always old enough to do what she wanted, and my brother was young enough to always get away with things. Since I was the middle child, everyone thought that I was more rebellious than others so I had earlier curfews, and I was limited to where I could go and who I could hang out with.

Being the middle child turned me into a rebellious child. I was already used to getting yelled at for no reason, so I figured that I might as well give them a reason to yell at me and make it worth their time. I broke curfew. I lied about where I was going and who I was with. I gained an attitude, and a very smart mouth.

Growing up as the middle child was never easy, but it did teach me a lot about myself. I am independent, and I am strong. It has been a rough ride, but I love my brother and sister, and I wouldn’t trade them for the world.