I'm sure growing up, your parents and teachers always told you to think before you speak. In my opinion, we as a society did not take that advice to heart. I think a lot of us, myself included, say things before thinking about the consequences of our words and who it could potentially hurt. I realize everyone may not share the same feelings I have toward the topics I will be discussing, but I hope we can all look past our different views and try to be considerate of other's emotions, regardless of what we think is morally right and wrong.
What sparked me to write this article was what I heard on one of my favorite morning radio shows. I was disappointed in what the host had to say about transgender individuals, and it compelled me to bring awareness to the issue after realizing many more people than just the radio host have said the exact same things. The radio team was discussing the highly publicized Caitlyn Jenner and her daughter, Kylie Jenner. I don't remember exactly what the story was on, but one thing the host exclaimed with great passion caught my full attention. She said, "I don't care what Caitlyn claims to be, he is still her (Kylie) dad and he is not a woman!" It broke my heart to hear these words, as Caitlyn Jenner has been struggling with her identity for years and years, and finally mustered up enough courage to be who she truly is. Forty-one percent of people who are transgender have attempted suicide in their lifetime due to bullying and feeling as if they are not understood. Comments such as the ones made on the radio show discourage transgender individuals and do more damage than people realize. I will not go into detail on my opinions of transgender rights, as this is not what this article is about. However, I do want to emphasize that using the correct pronouns when referring to transgender individuals is so important. Even if you do not feel the same way as me on the matter, at least being respectful and using the desired pronouns could potentially save a transgender life. Be aware of who you are calling a "he" or "she" and make sure that is what that person wishes to be called.
I grew up with pretty lenient parents and could say "bad" words without getting into too much trouble, but when it came to the "R" word, it was a different story. "Retarded" was banned from my family's vocabulary, and for very good reason. It is by no means acceptable to refer to someone or something as retarded and use it as a negative term. People throw the word around so loosely and it could be hurting those around them. While looking up the definition, I was appalled to see that "very foolish or stupid" was listed as one of the informal definitions. Look what we have done. We have successfully said that word so much in the wrong context that it made the dictionary. Those who have an intellectual disability are not "stupid or foolish." They are bright, creative, and beautiful, and should not be considered as a lesser caliber than others. My brother, who has autism, has been called retarded, and nothing is more heartbreaking than hearing that word directed to someone you love. Before you say something or someone is retarded, remember what you are saying and all of those people you are hurting.
The last word I have an issue with people using is "slut." Slut shaming is a form of social stigma, typically applied to women, who are judged on their presumed sexual behaviors. There is a phenomenon that some males want women to perform more sexual acts, but when a female does engage in sexual activity, she is seen as a "slut" or not having any morals. The fact of the matter is, no matter how you feel about sexual activity or premarital sex, it is not okay to call someone that. We can do whatever we want with our own bodies, and should not be called derogative terms because we exercise our free will. Often people say that women who are raped were "asking for it" based on what the woman was wearing or how she was acting. This is called victim blaming, or the act of blaming the victim for the occurrence rape or other sexual harassment, rather than the perpetrator. No one (boy or girl) should be called a slut or any other name based on what they choose to wear or say. Clothes, or anything else for that matter, do not give anyone any right to touch another person without their full consent. Girls, especially teenagers and young women, tear other girls down and call each other sluts and other nasty terms, causing us to fall into a vicious cycle. We will never be able to rid the word out of our vocabulary if we keep calling each other that. Next time you open your mouth to call someone a slut, or hear someone else say it, think about the girl's feelings and her situation, and remember to be kind or speak up and say that it is not right to call anyone that. Everyone does something for a reason, and everyone has a story. Clothes or sexual acts do not define a person, and no one should be labeled in that way. Let's instead build women and each other up, exercise our rights to our bodies, and think before we speak.
A young girl who is called a slut could start to hate herself while her self-esteem is shattered. An intellectually disabled individual called a "retard" could feel discouraged about their learning journey and make them feel as unequal to the rest of their peers. A transgender woman or man who is not respected could feel as if the whole world is against them. All of our words have consequences, good or bad, and simply thinking before we speak could pave the way to a new-found kindness and respect we have toward each other, making the world a much better place.
