Students may face an array of dangers during their college career, but one of the most frightening dangers is the risk of sexual assault. Many people feel like these assaults are just something you hear on the news, or only occur at some colleges in a big city. However, studies show that one in five women will be sexually assaulted during their college years, as will one in ten men. Sexual assault is something that I believe no person should ever have to experience. That being said, here is some information on how to prevent sexual assault, and what to do if you are assaulted.
1. What Is Sexual Assault?
Sexual assault is unwanted or forced sexual activity. This includes, but is not limited to kissing, touching, flashing, voyeurism, threats (verbal and nonverbal), and rape. So, as you can see, sexual assault is not always physical.
Another misconception many people have about sexual assault is you won’t know the attacker. In truth, victims often know their attacker personally. According to RAINN (Rape, Abuse, and Incest National Network), thirty-eight percent of all rapes are committed by a sexual partner, friend, or acquaintance. Because victims typically know their attackers, the most common place of assault is the home of the victim or attacker.
2. Prevention
The simplest way to prevent assault is to trust your gut and familiarize yourself with signs of abuse. If you don’t feel safe with a situation or a person, get out of there. However, if your gut is full of butterflies it can be harder to see the red flags. So, be sure to watch for physical abuse (pushing and bruising), controlling behavior, and threatening language. No one needs that in their life anyway, even if it doesn’t lead to assault.
If you’re going out, stay with friends or at least let them know where you are, and be wary of drinks you don’t get yourself. Rohypnol, GHB, and Ketamine are classified as “date rape” drugs for a reason; it’s not hard to slip these into drinks. Being aware of your surroundings will greatly reduce your risk of being assaulted.
Finally, if you find yourself in a dangerous situation, put up a fight. Run, hide, scream, and fight back; this all helps.
3. If You Are Assaulted
The most important thing to remember if you are assaulted is that it’s not your fault. Someone chose to hurt you. It doesn’t matter what you were wearing or how you were flirting; it’s not your fault, and you didn’t ask for it. Also, many times attackers will claim that it was okay because you enjoyed it, but just because your body reacts doesn’t mean you liked it; don’t let anyone fool you with this. You did nothing wrong, and it wasn’t your fault in any way.
If you’re raped, don’t take the time to shower, clean, brush your teeth, or change clothes. Go straight to the hospital. Here they can get DNA from the attacker, treat possible wounds, test you for STIs, and supply you with emergency contraception if you desire. If you wish to file a report and pursue justice, you can go to the local police station. Most police stations have an officer who deals with sexual assault specifically, so don’t feel embarrassed talking with them, they do this all the time. While at the police station you can also file for a restraining order. Because your attacker may not go to jail, it may be nice to have a little insurance that they won’t bother you again.
If you live with your attacker or know them personally, cut them out of your life and find a safe place. Surround yourself with friends and loved ones, and make sure you have a good support system. Basically just surround yourself with good.
If your attacker was a fellow student, don’t be afraid to report them. Many times it won’t be the attacker’s first offense, and reporting them prevents future attacks. You may feel guilty if they are expelled, suspended, or possibly sent to jail, but all of this is a result of their action, not you telling. Everyone deserves to feel safe at their school, including yourself. By speaking out, you can help make that happen.
Last, if you need help healing, don’t be afraid to reach out to people. Reach out for the support of those around you, and seek help through counseling. Schools usually offer free counseling to their students, but if you want to be counseled outside of the university, most counseling centers have a sliding fee scale for those with low income. Again, it’s not shameful to reach out for help. Men are less likely than women to reach out for help because of social stigmas and sexual confusion, but no one should feel ashamed of something they had no say in.
If you have been assaulted, keep in mind that this does not define you. You are not just a victim, and even if you are broken because of it you can become whole again. For those of you who know a sexual assault victim, remember to encourage them, listen to them, love them, and remind them that they are strong. By speaking out, being aware, and encouraging those who have been hurt, sexual assault can be a prevented and those who have been hurt can heal.
