Men, We Are Trying To Capture Your Potentials In College And Somehow That Might Be Ok

Men, We Are Trying To Capture Your Potentials In College And Somehow That Might Be Ok

It might be ok.

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This is something that has been on my mind recently with Danielle Bradbery's Song, but I have noticed some of the things on my own on top of the song. I think that as a female in college, you come to realize that males don't exactly have everything put together. Granted, there are moments that we as females don't have our shit together half the time, but as I have recently discovered they may look like they have everything together as we do but at the end of the day, they could use a little construction. This construction to me means potential, who men could be but who they aren't quite yet.

Now don't get me wrong, I am not trying to say this about all the men I come across. But, what I do know is that it sometimes feels like a carnival ride being around some men. Every day, you are trying to feel out if the ride is going to be bumpy or not, even before it happens. So when there are times that do shine the light on them in a unique but still confusing way, you analyze everything a little bit deeper. You try to figure out why they may be clueless about something or why they won't text you back in a timely fashion.

But deeper than that, you may think you know them better at times and can see their true potential and where they may be going in life. They may not be on your whole journey, but they will be a part of it soon. But you still know deep inside that they can work harder and get out of their shell a little more once they let their potential shine. My point being is that its ok to be a work in progress but at the same time being aware of the progress that you are making as you are navigating through this thing life. We all are trying to figure out where we are meant to be, but it just may take a little bit of time.

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An Appreciation Letter To My Boyfriend

I don't think I say it enough...
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To My Loving Boyfriend,

To start off, here's something I don't say nearly enough: thank you. Thank you, thank you, thank you from the bottom of my heart. You do so much for me that I can't even put into words how much I appreciate everything you do - and have done - for me over the course of our relationship so far. While every couple has their fair share of tiffs and disagreements, thank you for getting through all of them with me and making us a better couple at the other end. With any argument, we don't just throw in the towel and say we're done, but we work towards a solution that puts us in a greater place each day. Thank you for always working with me and never giving up on us.

Thank you for being supportive with everything that I want to do. Instead of trying to convince me 'no', you're encouraging me with a 'yes' or 'you got it'. Having you as my number one cheerleader is such a blessing, because I know I'll always have someone rooting for me. And you know that as much as you're cheering for me, I'm cheering for you right back. Having such immense support for one another is so important in any relationship, and I'm so lucky to have that kind of love and attention coming from you everyday.

I just wanted to let you know that I appreciate you more than words can write. I could probably talk for hours about how much I love you and how obsessed I am with you, but that's a little too much to put into an approximately 500 word piece. More importantly than telling you, I hope I'm able to show you everyday through my actions how much of a positive impact you have on my life. I'm certainly not the same person I was when we first started talking over two years ago, but I'm definitely a better person today than then, with a big thanks to you for that. You've helped me grow so much and I know you'll help me to improve for the better even more in the future.

I can't wait to see where life's adventures take us next. The only thing I know is that I definitely want to enjoy those adventures with you by my side. I promise to keep enjoying all of the little things that make every day with you so amazing. Thank you for the thousandth for everything that you do for me, because I don't know where I would be - or who I would be - had it not been you by my side all this time. Thank you for being my best friend, my secret keeper, and my confidante. And if I don't say it enough, always know I love you and everything that you do.

With So Much Love,

Your Very Appreciative Girlfriend

Cover Image Credit: Kayla Master

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To The Girl Telling Herself She Doesn't 'Catch Feelings,' Stop Lying To Yourself

"Catching feels" is not synonymous with a sickness, but with embracing the human capacity to feel that we all too often neglect.

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We're all guilty of it. We think we have this incredible Great Wall of China protecting our vulnerability; however, we tend to overestimate its security with defense mechanisms that could potentially hurt us in the long-term, concerning the formation of future relationships.

We must let others in to embrace the process of falling for someone

If you're like me, constantly busy and preoccupied with life's demands (sometimes going days without proper inhalation and exhalation), we become almost numb and ignorant of our emotions, mostly as a result from not putting ourselves out there. But this lack of experience is wrongly mistaken for the notion of attachment resistance. It's OK to focus on yourself, but after a while, it is necessary and fun to reawaken those feelings and jubilant moods associated with falling for someone, because in the midst of life's madness, we often forget how to feel.

Do not attempt to avoid to "catch feels" like it's the plague

We're consistently bombarded with false advice from society to avoid "catching feels," or falling for someone, no matter the costs. Why is it suddenly so frowned upon to actually like someone you met? Why should we feel shame in wanting to continue a relationship with this person? Dating is evidently complicated in the 21st century, but don't let this make you try to consciously repress those newly-formed feelings since repression essentially leads to escalation. Embrace the feels because it's the human thing to do.

Loosen your wall's bricks with vulnerability

Some of our jerk-alert senses are more activated than others, mostly due to past experiences, but it's important to hammer into our heads that they're not all the same.

Stop lying to yourself. No matter how much you repress it, you will feel, you will get attached, and you will allow yourself to do this, despite what the norm is for what "dating" is today. Break off from your defense mechanisms and your wall will slowly follow. Remember: "catching feels" is not synonymous with sickness, but with embracing the human capacity to feel that we all too often neglect.

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