So, Christmas is over. How are you feeling? After waiting 364 days of the year, the pivotal day has passed and we all can breathe of sigh of relief. Christmas is crazy and I am never ready for the holidays but every year it comes without fail. Don't get me wrong, I love Christmas. The feelings, family, and gifts are what make the day special, something worth waiting for. But after the most wonderful day of the year, what are we supposed to do?
Sometimes it feels like we are waiting for nothing to arrive and the days seem to pass by extremely slow. I keep wanting and waiting for something to happen but it never comes. I wake up late and I am still so tired. I look at Canvas and nothing appears. I clean my house, but it gets dirty an hour later. The things I do feel like it doesn't matter, like time is just stringing me along until I burst from inactivity.
Wow, okay. Looking back that is a little dark, but you agree with me, yes? Time is constructive and something that humans made up, so I think it is okay to feel this way. After Christmas, we are supposed to rest and relax. Wait until the New Year comes, and make all these resolutions that we know will most likely not follow. Starting new habits are hard, and continuing old habits is very easy. Falling into the routine of the same old thing is what we revert back to because it is familiar. The week between Christmas and the New Year should be a time for starting those new things you want to bring into the New Year. But instead, I feel like I am in limbo.
It is a little hard to explain but I feel guilty and sort of anxious that I am not doing anything within this week that feels like time doesn't exist. Every time I try to do something more active and productive, I tell myself I should be resting. But when I rest, I tell myself that I need to be active. It is a weird mindset, but one that I cannot seem to get rid of.
In any case, I love Christmas and all of the amazing sights and sounds that go with it. But at times, we build up all of these perceptions of what Christmas should be and how we should feel. Then it comes and goes, without too much fanfare and then we are left with the waiting. New Years Eve is fun, but I do not go out to celebrate as there are some truly weird people that do not know how to drive and I'd rather not go to a hospital.
These post Christmas thoughts are weird but I feel like some people think the same as I do. Wanting to be active, but knowing this is a time for resting and inactivity. It's okay buddy, I feel and hear you.
