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Pokemon Go... More Like Pokemon No

Test-tried the latest Pokemon app and it was addicting.

Pokemon Go... More Like Pokemon No

Pokemon Go is an app created by the creators of Pokemon. They're bringing back not only nostalgia for children of the 90's, but also entertainment. This game is about catching Pokemons, which we all wanted to when we watched the series air when we were younger. Basically all we do is open the app and start collecting Pokemons. They will give you your first Pokemon free and easy to catch. But as you continue to play and level up, catching the Pokemons gets harder and harder. There are also Pokistops, where you can get freebies such as Pokiballs and berries. There are also gyms where you can battle other trainers. The home screen is a GPS system that will guide you to the nearest destination that will have stuff. All you have to do is keep a lookout for Pokemons.

Here is part of the promotional video that they sent out to attract us.

Things you see, feel, or are more likely do when you play Pokemon Go!

  • The server always crashes!


  • Then when you try to log back in, the rare Pokemon that you were chasing disappears or runs away.


  • Also logging into Pokemon takes forever. You sign in with your Gmail or if you have a Pokemon Trainer Club account. You sign in and then the site crashes or freezes then you have to keep refreshing and signing in until you reach the page that looks like a GPS.


  • The app lies!! When you slide the little tab on the right side it says “three footprints away” and you’re like, “Oh well, if it’s just three footprints away I’ll just run up and catch it” but then as you walk you see the Pokemon going in the other direction and then you start walking in the other direction and then next thing you know the Pokemon disappears. The leaves on the map also have no meaning. You may think, "Oh, there are leaves, so there must be Pokemons nearby," no. There is nothing to the leaves they are just there to confuse you. You essentially have no idea what you're trying to catch and where you're going.


  • As you’re walking to catch said Pokemon, you don’t realize that you’ve walked behind the library trashcan or in the woods and could have gotten killed from crazy ax murderers out there.


  • When you’re trying to get to the blue stops to get some freebies like Pokemon balls, berries, and whatnot, you think you’ll reach it without having to drive all the way into the church’s front entrance, but no, you have to drive all the way up to even get your little person close enough to open up the blue stop (when you think you’re close enough, the app’s like, nope, come a little closer).


  • You will run into other trainers… and they will ask you or you will ask them “did you see… this Pokemon nearby” and “where exactly did you see it.”


  • Other trainers *if they are nice and competitive* will ask “what team are you” and then “do you want to team up and try to defeat the other team at the nearest gym.”


  • Just when you think you’ve had enough exercise, the game also requires you to walk to hatch an egg. You’re probably thinking that it’s only going to be a mile or so but no it ranges between five to ten kilometers of walking. (5 KM = 3 MI)


  • You’ll get angry even though you know it’s just a game; either at the system or because a rare Pokemon ran away.


  • When you see an empty image of a Pokemon as you drive to wherever you’re going, you’re like “man, I really want to catch it” or “I really want to know what it is.”


  • You wake up really early or stay up really late to catch Pokemon thinking you'll be awake before/after all the other “trainers” are getting up/going to sleep from their catch.


  • You skip your lunch break and walk to the nearest gym/blue stop seeing other people trying to catch Pokemons, too.


  • You take as many bathroom breaks as possible to check on the app because your boss is watching you and doesn’t want you to play on your phone.


  • You always think that if you go someplace unique that you’ll find more unique Pokemons… wrong. Pokemons show up like random places and random times. You will never know when a rare Pokemon is going to come out.


  • Of all the Pokemons out there, you will always get either a Ratata, Pidgey, Venonat, Weedle, or Spearow. You will then get excited that you got a buzz, but it ends in disappointment, because you see that it’s just the same Pokemon over and over again.


  • You will waste so much money on this app. You’ll think “wow, it’s only $0.99 for 100 tokens and then 100 tokens equals 20 Pokemon balls and that's like 20 more Pokemons in my pocket,” when in reality its $0.99 down the drain because you’ll need like five Pokemon balls to catch one Pokemon.


  • Five times out of six Pokemons that you try to catch will always fight you, even if you feed them berries.


  • It’s addicting. You think you’ll only catch one Pokemon for now and then later when your phone buzzes, you’ll see yourself checking your phone, but not for messages or emails, but for Pokemon updates about if there’s one nearby


  • If you even think about quitting, you’ll remember that everyone around you is still trying to catch Pokemons.

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
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