I miss the old days where we didn't have a care in the world. There were no worries about college or future careers. There was no drama over boys. There were no catty rumors, whispers, back-stabbing or gossip. And all of our fights were silly and were solved in ten minutes with laughter about it afterwards.

I miss our sleepovers, our truth or dare sessions, our ruthless monopoly and Mariokart sessions, and our movie nights with us jumping at the scary parts. I miss when we could be ourselves. I miss when we could be happy.

Now we all are growing apart, going into separate cliques, going separate ways into different lives and different futures. Now we are too old for sleepovers or scavenger hunts or open swims at the pool. Now many of you would ditch me or another in a heartbeat for a guy you've known for a month or because of some silly rumor that you've mistaken for the truth. Now I can't trust a lot of the people I've known or thought I've known forever.

Now we move onto a stage of life where we feel that drugs, sex or alcohol is the only way to feel accepted or that it's the only true way to numb the pain and stress that the teen years hand to us.

Now we are damaged, exposed to the self-esteem issues, severe family drama, school, and disappointments; the basic struggles we face as we grow up.

Now most nights I lay in my messy bedroom, feeling a huge hole in my life, missing when I could just be me. Wishing I wasn't so distant with the people I consider my sisters.

Now, I am currently in that stage of not being able to trust anyone, knowing that these people I care about, especially you, have the power to destroy me in an instant. There are fights I haven't resolved, and nothing will ever be the same anymore.

Now the only thing I look forward to is leaving this toxic town I've been living in all my life and never coming back.

But I will never forget any of you. I'll always remember those fun, hilarious memories that have shaped me into who I am today. And I understand these changes, it's just life. But man, do I miss the good old days.