Poetry On Odyssey: Sick Of Myself

Poetry On Odyssey: Sick Of Myself

If even I'm sick of me, I know everyone around me must be too...

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Reaching out for help is one of the hardest things to do, especially if you begin to feel like a burden because of it. This is a piece written about so desperately needing to talk it out, to get some help, but feeling like it's asking too much of the people around you.

Sick Of Myself

I can't go to anybody for help because they've all heard it a million times.

It's nobody's fault but my own and to push that burden on others is unfair.


Everyone around me is so beautiful, so filled with potential.

I look into myself, and I can see the winding staircases that make up my ribs.

An endless journey upstairs that nobody should be forced to conquer.

I can only tear down these steps myself, and I feel like my hammer just broke in my hands.


There is an endless thunderstorm following in my footsteps, and everyone around me is sick of the rain and lightning.

Why can't the static electricity make me feel something?

Maybe if I hold up all my insecurities like metal poles, something will finally spark.


If you listen close, you can hear the monotonous ticking underneath my words when I speak

I am a ticking time bomb.

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R. Kelly Faces New Accusations And Hopefully This Means The End Of His Reign Of Terror

"Surviving R. Kelly" helped to shed light on what was in the shadows for too long and now consequences have been dealt.

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R. Kelly is one of the most prominent R&B; artists of the '80s and '90s. However, his business as an artist is not the main reason his name is now resurfacing. Due to the attention brought on by a documentary, "Surviving R. Kelly", many started realizing what others tried to mention years ago.

In the documentary, the stories of numerous women who all have had contact with him talked in great detail about the terrors they encountered and horrors they still face. Included in those who took part in the documentary are Sparkle, Wendy Williams, Tarana Burke, and 50 others. Many talked about his obsession with pedophilia while mentioning his and predatory behavior toward women and abuse (physically, verbally, and sexually).

As of February 22, 2019, Robert Sylvester Kelly was charged with 10 counts of aggravated sexual abuse.

These charges are criminal, felonies, and were filled through Cook County in Illinois. "Surviving R. Kelly" shed light to what was in the shadows for too long and now consequences have just been dealt.

In the past, R. Kelly and his team have been able to slip through the grasps of justice. He was acquitted in 2008 for child pornography charges and numerous other incidents throughout the years. This time around, the R&B; artist is being investigated by three different federal law enforcement agencies surrounding evidence, testimonies, and statements made by those involved in the filming of the documentary.

A 45-minute tape including an underage 14-year-old girl and R. Kelly has been presented to prosecutors leading to the filing of charges. To note, this video is separate from the videos in which previously were used in cases on different charges. Along with this new video, two additional accusers have stepped forward to detail their encounters with the artist. These two women are a former protege and mother of a daughter who is presently involved with him.

Former protege, Lizzette Martinez went on to say when she was 17-years-old and forced into sexual acts numerous times with Kelly. Eventually becoming pregnant with R. Kelly`s child, Lizzette Martinez felt pressured by him to have an abortion; she ultimately miscarried later on. The other accuser, Michelle, explained her daughter`s ("N's") relationship with him. Michelle said that communication between her daughter and her is limited because R. Kelly`s enforced restrictions. R. Kelly and his team have denied all allegations multiple times as he is a "God-fearing man". While some still question the authenticity of these charges, others question if R. Kelly will actually face the consequences of his actions.

With these new charges and "Surviving R. Kelly" documentary, there is an important factor society must understand before his case continues and similar ones are filled. Between lust, fame, money, power, and more, there are hundreds of reasons why R. Kelly did not face convictions others would have easily. Yes, he is profitable, rich, and all of those hundred reasons but they are not suitable reasons that can come close in justifying these allegations.

AND EVEN MORE IMPORTANT there is NO reason for ANYONE to commit such crimes.

There is also no justifiable reason for anyone to commit such crimes and be able to get away with their actions time and time again. Over the course of his career, there have always been allegations and until the documentary, no one listened. It is time to give survivors the time and our ears for their story to be told and listened to.

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From The Girl Who Has Always Been The Odd One Out

All I wanted was to be friends and all they wanted was to push me away.

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Hi, I constantly surround myself with women in my life and somehow it always backfires.

So as a little girl I would constantly want to have friends and I would always be the nice girl that always tried to love everyone. Starting in elementary school I remember constantly being told that I cant play with the other girls and was always ran away from.

Being a young human I was very confused why girls never wanted to be my friend, all I ever did was tried to be nice and friendly to them. I even recall one time doing really stupid stuff on the playground for them to like me but it didn't work. I assumed I was always destined to be the odd one out with a good group of girlfriends.

This occurred when I was in dance too, I always tried making friends with everyone on the team but I was always constantly pushed away or thought of as weird because I was too nice. All I wanted was to be friends and all they wanted was to push me away and be rude, making fun of me for things I couldn't control like how skinny I was or my personality.

Going into middle school I remember being terrified of going because I was going from elementary school to middle school with no friends. I became friends with a few but slowly lost them over time because I realized they weren't good people and I didn't want to surround myself with that sort of negativity. This, of course, left me feeling lost and confused as to why I was being so kind and going out of my way to impress and make these girls like me.

There were a few months in the 7th grade that I was alone and had no friends at all, still sitting with my old friends that constantly bullied me and made me feel like shit. I didn't know what to do so I just endured the bullying from these girls that didn't understand me instead of being alone.

In all of my classes I would talk to all of the girls and try to be friends with them but I was pushed aside because they already had their friend group and I wasn't supposed to be part of it. Soon my luck turned around and I reconnected with one of my friends from elementary school and she introduced me to her friends. Those friends, though small are still together to this day 10 years later.

When I went to college I knew that I was going to experience the same thing that I experienced when I was going into middle school and high school. So, I had the brilliant idea to join a sorority because that was smart of me. I thought that since I liked doing community service and I wanted to make new friends that I would join…

The first few days were good, I felt included but very quickly I was again pushed to the side because everyone had now created their friend groups and I tried so hard to become friends with everyone. I had a very few amount of friends within my sorority and I felt like they were only there because they felt sorry for me. Now, I am no longer in the sorority or at the college I originally attended and no longer speak with anyone from there.

I just never fully understood why being a girl in this day and age was so hard for me when all I ever did was be the best person and true self I could be. I was never fake and never tried to be someone I wasn't just so I would be able to fit in. Now, I have my very few friends and I have realized that's all you really need sometimes.

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