Overthinking is a huge problem for a lot of people, myself included. Some of us feel the need to obsess over every little detail. Sometimes it's good, bad, or maybe even both. We want to know why something happened the way it did, what are the possible outcomes if I do X versus Y, how did this happen, and why did it happen to me? It can be an endless cycle of questions. Most cases overthinking leads to more negative thoughts and feelings. In my case, it leads to depression.
For people like me who constantly overthink, it has become a huge dilemma and can put a damper on life. Honestly, I think it's is a mental illness of some sort. It could be a form of obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD) or even an addiction. Think about it (just not too much).
Most of us don't want to overthink, but we can't help it; it just happens. Once it starts, it doesn't stop. I will start to obsess over something for hours, days even. Even if I want to stop, I can't. It's all I can ever think about; my mind will always find a way to resort back to that original thought. It's that constant stream of obsessive thoughts that can drive a person mad.
Overthinking can be an addiction though. There may not be substance abuse as with most addictions, but there is emotional abuse involved. Some people become addicted to the pain and/or the numbness overthinking may cause afterward. Maybe they feel empty without that feeling; therefore, they'll do anything to feel whole again, even if that includes driving themselves crazy with these constant thoughts.
For me, it's both. I can't stop sometimes because my mind doesn't want me to, but also because I feel strange when I'm not thinking about something. When you get used to being numb or being depressed from years of overthinking, the numbness becomes normal; all your body wants to do is feel normal. It truly is an endless cycle.
The biggest problem with overthinking is getting it to stop. When you notice someone is overthinking, don't tell them to "just stop." It doesn't work like that. Making comments like that will only tick them off and cause the problem to escalate. Their head will fill with more questions like "why are they telling me to stop? Did I do something wrong? Am I bothering them?" For some of us, just acknowledging the problem may work. Others, you may have to remind them that not every question needs to be answered, and reassure them that you will help them solve their problem(s) one question at a time.
Just please be mindful around an overthinker. We will analyze every move you make and every word you say, especially when it involves us. Also, remember that we can't always control our thoughts; please be patient.
