I have been working two jobs and only really focusing on making money and making sure that I have all my debt paid. I wasn't doing it to make me happy quite the opposite - it was making me miserable! I was so focused on money that I did not see what it was doing to me mentally. I wasn't taking any time for myself and the result was a complete burnout physically, I thought that making the most money and paying off my debt quickly was all that mattered.
Truthfully, I WAS WRONG!!! Just because you need money and maybe don't have a full-time career yet with a true salary does not mean you need to work yourself to the point that you cannot function in a normal society. Balance is key, I don't care if you have someone breathing down your back "make money, make money" the stress that it can put on your body is so much worse.
I was doing two jobs and when I went to my therapist and she asked me how I was, I broke down, I cried and cried I was panicky and depressed I hated my life and every time I got home Wendi was alerting me to a panic attack, she was always right too; 9 times out of 10 I had a panic attack when I got home or I was just so stressed I was not truly even able to function I lost the control of my disability.
When I saw my therapist she looked at me, not with disappointment but with sadness and only asked one question, "Are you happy?" No, I was not happy I was upset and could not understand why others could do two jobs and be successful at them but I was struggling so much. Then I noticed something about myself I have trouble with two jobs because of my anxiety. It made me so stressed and worried every day that I had to work so much and make so much money each day to be able to pay my bills and to lower my debt that I was just worried constantly about making enough money.
For some working two jobs is okay it is not the most sustainable life, but we do what we must to survive and help our families. Some of us however, have so much trouble with living our lives with just one job and having balance that bringing in a second job can throw our lives into chaos. In my opinion having a balance in our lives is essential for us to be happy. I want balance and working two jobs for me dealing with my PTSD makes me too anxious. I want to be able to deal with my debt and pay it off and build a savings but it does not matter if I don't have balance because truthfully being happy and healthy is all that matters.
