Trends come and go.
Suspenders have come and gone and come again.
Bell bottoms have come and gone and come again.
High-waisted pants have also come and gone and here we go.. they have come again.
Those of us from my generation know what I mean when I utter the word "gauchos".
A somehow stylish way to hide your thighs while accentuating your calves.
The soft, silky nature of these groovy pants excited my eight year old heart.
One of my most embarrassing moments of all time I blame on these mischievous cloths I placed on my legs.
I remember the day like it was yesterday.
I walked into JCPenney in high hopes I would be walking out with the coolest capri, dress slack, sweats combo.
Unfortunately, my size was completely out.
So, naturally, I convinced my mother that these gauchos (which were about two sizes too big) were the perfect fit!
As I walked out of the mall that day, little did I know that I would be facing a blushing and bashful kind of embarrassing moment due to my passion for style.
As a young child, some would have considered recess my favorite subject in school. Naturally, the first child out the door and onto the black asphalt got the first pick of jump ropes, kickballs, and other miscellaneous playground additives.
Proud of her gaucho-pant-choice, young Shelby made her way out the door far past every fellow classmate in sight.
Running as fast as her short and stout legs could muster, Shelby managed to make it halfway down the sidewalk before her two-sizes-too-big gauchos began to swiftly fall to her ankles...
There I was, eight-year-old me, standing at the end of the sidewalk... trying desperately to pull up my gauchos and save a little bit of my dignity.
To this day, I consider this moment one of the most embarrassing moments in my life thus far.
Please, please, I beg you fashionistas, designers, anyone who has a say in trends and department store ads... do not in any way, in any form, bring back the gaucho.
No one wants the gaucho back.
No one needs the gaucho back.
What, someone wants the gaucho back?
Wear capris.
Badabing. Badaboom.
You're welcome.
Please, for the love of all that is good and holy and sacred... keep the gaucho a thing of the past.
Though it may bring (*minor) profits, the gaucho takes me back to my eight-year-old self with my pants around my ankles and frankly, I want to save as many children as I can from experiencing the same awkward, forever-embarrassing moment as I had.
