Hey you, yeah you! You’re the person who everyone sees as having their life together. Everyone comes to you with all their problems and tells you how you give the best advice. But no one ever seems to care about how you are doing. Even when they ask the cliche line “How are you?” You respond with “I’m alright” or “I’m okay” and they don’t respond anymore or just ignore your response and start talking about something else. You’re the person who puts everyone else’s happiness before your own, and you question why because when does anyone ever do that for you. And sometimes you feel like you just can’t do it anymore.
When I say can’t do it anymore, I’m not talking about being suicidal, I’m talking about feeling physically, mentally, and emotionally dead, to the point where you can just lay in bed for hours staring at the ceiling not realizing the time that has gone by. You have no motivation to do anything. Then you eventually just isolate yourself from everyone, even your closest friends. It’s not the feeling that you can’t do it anymore that gets you, it’s all the other stuff that comes with it. It’s the feeling of being left out, lonely, uncared for, overwhelmed, and so much more. But most of all you feel lost. Sometimes you just cry, and the worst part about it, you don't know why, you're jsut sad. Sure you have friends and family you can go to, but you question whether they even care about you at times. You try so hard to help and please everyone but no matter what you do, it never seems to be good enough for anyone. Sometimes you just can't get it right, or at least it seems that way. Which is okay because you realize everyone makes mistakes, but yours just seems to be huge ones that affect friendships or life choices rather than small ones that don't have any affect on you. Or it seems that way. On top of everything though, you just feel like something is missing, but you have no idea what it could be.
Every day is hard for you to get up out of bed, let alone to put on a smile and act like everything in your life is perfect, but it’s not, it feels like everything is crashing down on you all at once. And the worst part, it just seems like everything keeps getting worse and worse and there is no light at the end of the tunnel. But there is, as hard as it is to believe there is a light at the end of the tunnel.
You just have to keep going. Keep faking that smile, helping others, and doing your everyday best. Keep fighting. You may feel like you’re dying, but it will be okay. Have something to fight for. Whether it’s your future, your goals, your friends, family members, pets, or whatever it might be. Keep being the good person you are towards others because eventually someone will notice and appreciate your kindness, you will see the light, and not only wonder why you felt that way before, but you will feel full and have everything you have ever dreamed of. Even though you feel physical, mentally, and emotionally dead now, just remember there is more to life than this feeling and eventually, you will see the light, sometimes when you at least expect it.
The person who has been there more than once