To The People I Miss

I don't know if it's because of finals week filling me with a lot of emotions or what, but lately, I've been missing a lot of people that in my life. These people have either lost contact with me, passed away or are just far from me right now. All in all, my heart feels heavy and I think this is why.

To Whom It May Concern,

In French, I miss you is "tu me manques", and in Spanish, it is "tu me haces falta". In both cases, it literally means "you are missing from me"--as if a part of me is gone because you are not there. That is truly what it feels like.

I miss you every day because I am not really me without you. You make me smile in ways other people can't. You make me laugh in ways other people can't. You make me, me in ways other people can't.

I am my most comfortable self around you--I can be as loud and careless as I want--and that's something that cannot be faked and is difficult to duplicate. I love you, I miss you, and I hope you're well.

Sometimes I'll be walking and I'll see things that remind me of you, or I'll hear something that would make you laugh or smile. I miss you then the most because I picture/hear your smile or laugh and it might just be what I miss the most about you. You light up a room just by being in it and the rooms here seem pretty dull in comparison.

Don't get me wrong, the feeling of missing you does not incapacitate me. I'm still able to be me and do what I normally do every day, but it makes me sad at random times. Life would be so different if you were always by my side. I don't know if that would be for the better or for worse but I would be happier and so, selfishly, it would be better.

Either way, I'm okay. I go about my days and I'll laugh. Sometimes I cry and wish you were by my side but then I think of what you'd say and it gets me through. I'm brave because I know you. You challenge me in ways no one else does and show me bravery when all I want to do is be a coward.

On the days where life is hard, I think back to the good times we had and the good times we will have and I move forward--because of you.

So, not only do I miss your goofiness, but I miss the light and positivity you bring to everything you do. I miss your carefree energy and how easily it would loosen me up when I was bound so tight. I miss being able to just be near you whenever I wanted.

Life is crazy, but when they say absence makes the heart grow fonder, they're not wrong. If you truly care about somebody, the feeling of missing them should feel like a part of you is gone. Thank you for making me feel this because it's how I know I truly love you. I can't wait to see you again soon.

Love,

Darlene