I have been spending a lot of time at airports this year due to various occasions, and as I sit here waiting to board my flight, I feel compelled to tell you about all the different types of people and things that piss me off when going through the airport.
When you arrive at the airport, you are herded into different drop off areas that never seem to go as smoothly as everyone thinks. People stop whenever the fuck they want and I guess it just doesn't occur to them that you can’t just swing open the car door whenever the hell you please. They never fail to get nasty looks from me as I pass by.
The next worst types of people at airports are the ones that check their bags and are over the 50lbs weight limit. So, naturally, they find it necessary to zip open their bags right there, and pull out every article of clothing that they own trying to make the weight limit. I’m sorry, but some of us prepared ahead of time and limited our packing so you can just leave now before I throw all your shit around the airport lobby.
OH but don’t worry! Once at security things get a whole lot worse. After your carry on goes through the stupid beeby, scanny, thing, I ADORE the people who stand right there, in the middle of the line, and put back on all their shit. Like I'm sorry, the last time I checked you don’t own the whole security line, so take your bin with all your shit and move where they have benches for that exact reason. You've already walked 10 minutes without shoes on, you can walk a couple more feet without them.
Maybe I just get annoyed really really easily, but these next type of people truly piss me the fuck off. Once you're finally boarding you have those assholes who literally cannot wait to get on the plane. LIKE CANNOT WAIT. If the flight starts boarding at 11, you better believe that they are already in that line waiting by 10:30. Like dude, calm the fuck down, the planes not going anywhere without you believe me.
And when you're on the plane, people think that they can shove their luggage into the overhead compartment when it CLEARLY doesn't fit. Like I’m not kidding, I cannot explain to you guys how many times I’ve been on planes that people break the over head storage. Like it’s really not hard to check your bags, that are obviously too big to be considered a carry on. Oh and on top of all that, the line that is formed when people relentlessly shove their bags up top, is enormous.
But hey, we can’t forget those people who immediately stand up when we have successfully landed at our destination and crowd the fucking aisle. Like where the fuck do you think you're going. Sit down and chill out, the doors don't even open for another 10 minutes so stop being a dumb ass.
And when I thought that people and their actions couldn't get any worse I forget I have to go to the baggage claim. And while people literally crowd the area that drops the first couple of bags, I stand like a normal fucking person, over to the side, and when I see my back I walk over, without hyperventilating like everyone else. I guess those three extra seconds people save by literally shoving people out of the way really gets them home faster.
I am currently sitting outside by the pool in 85 degree weather and while this rant has come to an end, it also has reminded me about the idiots I'm going to have to encounter on my travels back home. Can’t wait….But if you get one thing from this article, I hope it’s this; just don't be a fucking asshole at the airport.
