Lately, I've been thinking a lot about and trying to understand why people act the way they do? I think about human behavior and what drives people to say and do things. And I know that I cannot control the behavior of others, I'm not that powerful nor do I want to.

But there is one wish that I have: that people remember how important it is to be honest about who they are and what they want.

For example, at times the word's coming out of someone's mouth and the messages they send do not line up with their behavior. And obviously, that would leave you very confused, because you're like, "You said one thing yet you did another?"

Again, I know how frustrating that can be. But to that, I say, remember that you cannot control the behavior of others. Also, if they say that they are not about you but still are kind to you and do things with/for you, honestly I'd savor that. If they say they care about you and then act like they don't, that's where I have questions.

Usually when this happens, if you've known the person long enough, I would suggest having a conversation with them about their behavior. If you don't think that would take/think they'd get defensive/think that they won't have the conversation, that's not a person you need in your life.

That leads me to the next thing: people who avoid difficult conversations.

I hate this because you're literally saying I'd rather act different or avoid someone than talk to them about what they did that bothered me. And if you can't point to a singular thing that bothers you, maybe they didn't actually do anything and you need to look within.

Or if two people in a relationship are fighting and one will not talk about it... why? Maybe it's just a "me" thing, but I'd much rather talk about whatever is going on — no matter how much it might hurt me — than avoid it and not know what behavior I need to correct or what is bothering you and let it fester.

I also think ghosting has become a side effect of people not wanting to be honest about how you're feeling. I think what bothers me the most is people who treat you nice and talk to you a lot and then suddenly disappear and you never get an explanation as to why.

For someone who wasn't that great and you didn't feel connected to, ghosting might not be a big deal. But someone that you were beginning to feel connected to yet suddenly they disappear into thin air, leaves you very confused. Instead, they could just say, "Hey, this isn't going in the direction I'd hoped or it's been fun but I'm exploring other options."

OK, not great and probably not what you want to hear but at least you know.

And I know someone is gonna say you don't owe anyone an explanation as to why you don't want to be in their life anymore but if you've known each other as friends or in an intimate way for more than three months and you've spent time together, I think it would be beneficial to let them know why you suddenly stopped doing that.

I really just wish honesty was still a virtue people lived by and held themselves to because trying to live in a world where that is slipping away is extremely painful.