Parents should start talking to their children about sexuality as early as childhood. Parents can build strong relationships with their children and set clear expectations and boundaries for them. Speaking about sex at an early age will increase the chances of teens approaching their parents when the difficult subject comes up. This will help break the communication barrier between parents and children and allow other subjects to be easier to talk about.
I was sixteen years old when I had my first boyfriend. I was so excited just to have a boyfriend that the idea of sex never crossed my mind. My mother was the one that brought up the subject of sex up to me. I was so embarrassed and uncomfortable to talk about sex and sexuality with my mother. It was not until later I realized that what my mother did made it easier to bring it up to her when I felt as though I was ready to start having sex. Parents don't realize how influential they are in the decisions their children make regarding sex.
Before that moment I hadn't had the “sex talk” since I was eleven in school. We were taught that sex was for procreation and to not explore our sexuality until we were old enough to be parents. But in our sex-driven culture, where anyone of any age can find porn practically anywhere and women are sexualized in advertisement selling cars and burgers in their bikinis, this an unrealistic expectation.
This creates a major contradiction in what we tell children about sex. Children are raised to believe sex is a taboo subject and that it's wrong. Then when they reach adolescence, society pressures them into heterosexual activities and then they end up getting information or misinformation about how to have sex from their more “experienced” peers.
Our society links sexuality with procreation but we need to acknowledge that the two need to be separated. Teenage pregnancies and abortions are on the rise. If we acknowledge this we can have an open communication with our friends, parents, and partners. We can help avoid procreation by talking about contraception and learning about how to prevent sexually transmitted infections.
I was fortunate to grow up with parents that talked openly and honestly with me and seized opportunities to help me make smart decisions about birth control and contraceptives. Consequently, when I did become sexually active I wasn't afraid to bring up the subject to my mother. There are dangerous consequences when it comes to sex and it is critical for a parent to recognize that and help their children make responsible decisions. Studies show that teens who have discussed sex with their parents are more likely to wait longer to begin having sex and more likely to use contraception when they do.
Opening up the discussion of sex will break down the communication barrier between parents and children and will expose other topics as well. These topics can include alcohol consumption and how to drink responsibly, as well as bringing up mental health problems like suicide and depression. Being able to have an open communication with a parent is beneficial to a child’s mental and physical health.
