When people think of punctuation, they usually think of the usual ones like, full-stops, commas, exclamation points, question marks, to not mean anything other than their intended use. For Project Semicolon, taking the meaning of a semicolon and creating a community, built on love, understanding, and most importantly, access to resources. It was founded in 2013 by Amy Bleuel in memory of her father who died by suicide. Those involved with Project Semicolon, started getting tattoos that incorporated semicolon's.
The semicolon has become a symbol for people living with Suicidality, Suicidal Thoughts, and Suicidal Depression. Amy Bleuel defines the semicolon's meaning as, "In literature, an author uses a semicolon to not end a sentence but to continue on. We see it as you are the author and your life is the sentence. You’re choosing to keep going,".
On March 29, 2017, The Mighty reported that Amy had passed away by Suicide (link).
I know personally, I was hit with an intense wave of grief, uncertainty, and anxiety of, "what now?". I felt grief for a woman I had never met, but shared a strong connection with. I felt uncertain about how someone who was such an advocate for mental health, felt as though ending her story was the best answer.
I got my semicolon tattoo a few month after I had voluntarily admitted myself into an Intensive Out-Patient (IOP) program for my own Passive Suicidal Thoughts. I attended 3 group therapy sessions a day, four days a week, for over a month. I learned new coping skills, I realized I wasn't alone in my fight, I was never ever alone (more on my story here).
For me, my semicolon tattoo reminds me that my story isn't over, and that I still have many more chapters to write. With regular counseling sessions, my family, and my friends, I know that I have all the support that I need.
Amy, I'm so sorry that you felt like this was the only way out. I'm sorry that we weren't there for you. Thank you for sharing your story with us, and for giving us something to remember our own stories by.
If you or someone you know is suffering from Suicidal Thoughts, please reach out. For more information, visit the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline's Website. Call 1-800-273-8255 for 24/7 support, or text HOME to 741741 (link).
