Dear Me,

Let me start by saying, stop blaming yourself. Stop allowing others to make you feel as though you are inferior. You have so much to offer this world. Why allow others to take that from you? The friend who says she will be there for you through the best and worst times was the one who left … during the worst times. The boy who said he would love you forever and go to the ends of the earth for you found excuses to offer you less than you deserved. And the “popular” crowd who never promised you anything and always made sure you didn’t matter, well soon enough they won't matter either.

What truly frustrates me is the countless hours and days you would manipulate yourself into thinking that you were the problem. That’s not how it works. The world is filled with billions of people and the small fraction you will know in your lifetime will not all be part of your future happiness. Please get over yourself by thinking that you control the actions and mentality of others. Its not you, it’s life. Life is not promise; there is no manual to how it will play out or cheat codes to succeed. However, I can promise you that it gets better.

This is the part where I tell you, the friends you have at the moment will not all follow you to the future, and that’s okay. You will have people in your life that will play a certain role for a certain time to get you through the moment. Whether it's that friend you had by your side when the first boy you loved broke your heart, or it’s the friend you giggled with when you talked about prom; these people will be there for you when life thinks you need them. You will soon learn, some friendships are like boats passing by on the way to a permanent destination. You too have a destination to reach and you will whether you think so or not. You will lose the friend you never thought would leave, and that’s not to say they will never cross paths with you again, it just means right now they have their own journey to pursue just like you.

Now here is the part where I am going to get tough with you. He is not the one for you. Now hear me out, that is not to say he is a bad person, or that you did something to mess things up. It just means what I said; he is not the one for you. You may think you are deeply in love, and maybe at the moment you are, but it’s not enough to just love someone. You need to hear something and I think it's what you have always needed to hear; you deserve the love you don't think you deserve. Yes, you read that right. You think the love you deserve is less because that’s how you feel, less than what you are. It is not okay to ever feel convenient, or as though you are just there for him. You will fight hard for him and feel like the loser every single time.

Now here is some light at the end of the tunnel. Today, you are happy. You don’t have it all figured out. I can promise you that, but that’s okay. You have a best friend you can lean on, a boyfriend who reminds you how loved you are everyday and a family who will support and love you unconditionally. It is not a fairytale ending and trust me there will be times life gets tough again and you feel defeated. But don’t. You almost gave up multiple times and would have missed out on the amazing memories life has given you. There is more to come, and remember, “this too shall pass.”

Love Always, Me.