An Open Letter To My Friend Going Through A Breakup

An Open Letter To My Friend Going Through A Breakup

You can get through this.
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To my amazing friend,

Though I have not known you for long, I feel closer to you than some people I have known since I was in Kindergarten. I know you are going through a rough time right now, and I wish more than anything that I could take all of your pain away so that you would never be sad. Seeing you this way truly breaks my heart.

I know that things are hard right now, but trust me, it will get better. You can get through this, and I know for certain that you will. Please know that I am by your side and that I am here for you, always. If you need a shoulder to cry on, I will be there. If you want to rant on about how much you hate him, I will be a listening ear. If you want to order pizza and ice cream and forget that he exists, I'm certainly up for that.

Please understand that I feel the same pain that you do. It hurts me to see you this way, and there is not a person in this world that deserves to feel the heartbreak of a breakup, but especially not you. I know this is a cliche, but everything happens for a reason. Try to think of this as a learning experience and try to take the good out of the situation instead of the bad. Try not to pity yourself or put the blame on you, because you are not the problem. This boy is missing out on one of the greatest girls in the world, and that is truly his loss.

You are probably feeling so many emotions right now; from confused, to hurt, to angry, to just plain sad. And these emotions are all ok to feel. Don't bottle them up! If you feel the need to cry, then just cry. If you want to scream, then do it! (Though maybe into a pillow so your dorm neighbors don't hear!) Me and the rest of your friends will all be there to guide you and help you through whatever emotions you are experiencing. Even if you don't think that we are here to help you, I assure you that we are. We support you and just want the very best for you.

Remember, you lived without him before he was in your life, and you can live without him now, too. You have wonderful and caring friends who would drop everything to help you and a great family who will support you. This is just a bump in the road –– after this is over, you will come out that much stronger and more confident. There is a boy out there who is perfect for you and will love you for every single thing about you, you just have not find him yet. Sometimes, to find your prince you have to kiss a few frogs first.

So, my friend, I hope that after reading this you know that I, and so many other people, are here for you during this difficult time. It may seem like the end of the world, but I promise it is not. You are beautiful, kind, strong, smart and caring, and whoever is missing out on that is absolutely crazy.

Love,

Me

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To The Boy Who Will Love Me Next

If you can't understand these few things, leave before things get too involved
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To the boy that will love me next, I need you to know and understand things about me and my past. The things I have been though not only have shaped the person I’ve become, but also sometimes controls my life. In the past I’ve been used, abused, and taken for granted, and I want something real this time. The guys before you were just boys; they didn’t know how to treat me until it was too late. They didn’t understand how to love me, until I broke my own heart. Before you truly decide to love me I want you to understand these things.

When I tell you something, please listen.

I’m my own person, I want to be loved a certain way. If I ask you to come over and watch movies with me please do it, if I ask for you to leave me alone for a few hours because it’s a girl’s night please do it. I don’t just say things to hear my own voice, I say things to you because it’s important to my life and the way I want to be loved. I’m not a needy person when it comes to being loved and cared for, but I do ask for you to do the small things that I am say.

Forgive my past.

My past is not a pretty brick road, it is a highway that has a bunch of potholes and cracks in it. I have a lot of baggage, and most of it you won’t understand. But don’t let my past decided whether you want to love me or not. My past has helped form who I am today, but it does not define who I am. My past experiences might try and make an appearance every once in a while, but I will not go back to that person I once was, I will not return to all that hurt I once went though. When I say those things, I’m telling the complete and honest truth. I relive my past every day, somethings haunt me and somethings are good reminds. But for you to love me, I need you to accept my past, present and future.

I’m just another bro to the other guys.

I have always hung out with boys, I don’t fit in with the girl groups. I have 10 close girlfriends, but the majority of my friends are guy, but don’t let this scare you. If I wanted to be with one of my guy friends I would already be with him, and if you haven’t noticed I don’t want them because I’m with you. I will not lose my friendships with all my guy friends to be able to stay with you. I will not cut off ties because you don’t like my guy friends. I have lost too many buddies because of my ex-boyfriends and I promised myself I wouldn’t do that again. If you don’t like how many guy friends I have you can leave now. Don’t bother trying to date me if you can accept the fact I’m just another bro.

I might be a badass, but I actually have a big heart.

To a lot of people I come off to be a very crazy and wild girl. I will agree I can be crazy and wild, but I’m more than that. I’m independent, caring, responsible, understanding, forgiving, and so such more type of woman. Many people think that I’m a badass because I don’t take any negatively from anyone. Just like we learned when we were younger, “if you don’t have anything nice to say, don’t say it at all.” Most people can’t do that in today’s world, so I stick up for myself and my friends. I don’t care what anyone thinks about me, or their option on how I live my life. The only thing I care about is being able to make myself happy. Even though I’m an independent woman, understand that I do have a big heart. Honesty when I truly care for someone I will do just about anything they ask, but don’t take advantage of this. Once you take advantage of this part of me, all respect will be lost for you.

I’m hard to love.

Sometimes I want to be cuddle and get attention, and sometimes I don’t want you to talk to me for a couple hours. Sometimes I want you to take me out for a nice meal, but sometimes I want a home cooked meal. Every day is different for me, sometimes I change my mind every hour. My mood swings are terrible on certain days, and on those days you should probably just ignore me. I’m not easy to love, so you’ll either be willing to find a way to love me, or you’ll walk out like so many others have.

I’m scared.

I’m scared to love someone again. I’ve been hurt, heartbroken, and beat to the ground in my past relationships. I want to believe you are different, I want to hope things will truly work out, but every relationship has always ended up the same way. I’m scared to trust someone, put my whole heart into them, just to be left and heartbroken again. I sick and tired of putting my whole body and soul into someone for them to just leave when it is convenient for them. If you want to love me, understand it won’t be easy for me to love you back.

When “I’m done.”

When I say “I’m done” I honestly don’t mean that I’m done. When I say that it means I need and want you to fight for me, show me why you want to be with me. I need you to prove that I’m worth it and there’s no one else but me. If I was truly done, I would just walk away, and not come back. So if I ever tell you, “I’m done,” tell me all the reasons why I’m truly not done.

For the boy who will love me next, the work is cut out for you, you just have to be willing to do it. I’m not like other girls, I am my own person, and I will need to be treated as such. For the boy that will love me next, don’t bother with me unless you really want to be with me. I don’t have time to waste on you if you aren’t going to try and make something out of us. To the boy who will love me next, the last thing I would like to say is good luck, I have faith in you.

Cover Image Credit: Danielle Balint

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5 Ways To Pass The Time On Your Lengthy Road Trip


"Stop worrying about the potholes in the road and enjoy the journey."

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Whether you're driving home for the summer, taking a cross-country road trip with your friends, or driving out-of-state for an internship, the time you spend crammed inside a car can be the death of you as the hours seem to drag on and on. From someone who drove through six states alone in an entire day -over a thousand miles- here are a few things you can do to make the time go faster.

1. Start driving early.

The earlier you start driving, the better. Driving in an unfamiliar place as the day begins to transition from day to night can be a little unsettling; you could get lost by taking the wrong exit or turn, or God forbid you're having car issues and left somewhere dangerous, or you need a bathroom break and are forced to pull up to a gas station that's straight out of a scary movie. When you're driving and the day starts getting darker, you become more exhausted than before.

2. Listen to audiobooks.

A concept: the book you never got to read during the semester because you were too busy with your other classes but it's read by your favorite author in audio format to kill at least a good four hours (or more depending on the book) during your road trip.

3. Listen to podcasts.

There is a podcast for everyone and everything, I promise. When you find the one podcast that speaks to you, it is a never-ending rabbit hole from there and you'll end up wishing your road trip was longer.

4. Get some snacks.

Stopping anywhere other than a fast food joint can delay your trip and the fast foods available to us aren't always the best options. Be sure to pack your favorite snacks or even your favorite easy homemade meal. If you're going to stop for a break, make the time well-spent by eating something you actually enjoy and you'll feel good to drive for another few hours.

5. Create a hit music playlist.

No road trip would be complete without a playlist compiled of your favorite jams to get you by. Take the time to explore new genres or nostalgic classics.

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