When it comes to romance or love, I consider myself to be a pessimist. I didn’t believe in destiny or true love, nor did I believe in love at first sight. I thought it was merely a fable, something romantics yearned for and that gave them this unrealistic expectation of relationships and love.
That is, until I met you.
I had known of you for quite some time, and people would describe you in all of your greatness to me. I was a little apprehensive at first. You require a certain type of person to be able to handle you, and everything you come with. You were a time commitment, a massive one to say the least.
Many people pined after you, dreamed about you, even fell in love with you, but you have the highest of standards. You were stern and required discipline, with a needed level of maturity and competence to be in your presence. I was intimidated of you. Many people are still intimidated of you.
I’ll never forget our first encounter. I walked into the room, my palms sweating and my shoulders vibrating. I couldn’t tell if I was cold, or if it was all just nerves flying through my system. I wasn’t sure what to expect, nor did I fully realize who you were. Sure, I had wanted to meet you for a long time, but what if you were not what I was prepared for? What if I could not handle you? People are said to feel lightheaded and dizzy, sometimes they even pass out upon meeting you. Would I, too? Would I fall victim to your extremity? It wasn’t until that first moment where you enabled me to see your world that I realized, you were the one for me.
You were this huge burst of vitality. The movements you performed were so delicate and precise, almost as if you were performing a symphony. Hands dancing with the expertise of an artist, but soft like the pointe shoe of a ballerina. You required the focus of a nuclear engineer, but the actions and the intensity of you made that seem easy. You needed a team, all decorated and dedicated to your mission. I had never seen something quite like you. You did not even need to talk to convey your needs or even just something you wanted to happen or say, the magic that occurred in that room spoke for you.
I fell hard. I went in to see you every day, trying to get in as many rooms as possible to be exposed to you. I met as many people as I could that you trusted to do your tremendous, miraculous work. I explored every corner possible of your home and tried to understand your language to the best of my ability. You are a complexity, but you are also a teacher. Your proteges spend hours studying you and learning from those who shaped you into what you are today. Countless new innovations, seamless successes, glory and surprises; they were all something that came from you.
So, to the great love of my life, surgery,
This is my outlet, dedicated to you.
Maybe one day, when I’m older and can finally understand everything you encompass, I might finally fully get to experience you in all of your glory. Maybe, I will be fortunate enough to study under you, and maybe eventually get to work alongside you, within the walls of your home. Maybe, our story will be a great epic, and I will finally get to live out the happily ever after that I have dreamed of. Until that point, I will not know if you love me as much as I love you. But, with all great love stories comes risk, sacrifice, and strength, and for you? I’d give up the world for you.