After 18 years in a small town, I longed for change. I will never forget the first time I saw your shining lights and the streets filled with people I would never see twice. I knew I had found what I had always been looking for. At first I couldn't put my finger on what made you so special, but as my time went on I realized what it was about you that I loved so much.
When it all began, I felt lost. It was something I had always dreamed of and I couldn’t believe that I was finally standing on your streets. It took a little while to become accustomed to the fast pace of life, and the fact that it seemed as though everyone was running everywhere. I began to walk at a brisk pace, and realized that if I made eye contact with someone while walking, we would run into each other. And the truth is, where you’re from, nobody has time to be behind.
When I got used to it, I fell in love. It was as though I felt like someone else. The streets held some sort of magic that made it seem as though I could be anything I wanted. There were hallways leading to every life goal I had. Everyone who I passed on the street seemed important. Even if they weren’t, they walked around as if they were. The small things are what made you so unique. The fact that everyone dresses how he or she pleased and said whatever thought came to mind. It was beautiful, and in that moment I knew I didn’t want to spend life anywhere else.
When I left you, I felt empty. You had made it feel as though anything was possible, but not quite yet. I couldn’t pick up and leave my current life for the life of my dreams, and it took a while to accept that. While I was at home I longed for you. The busy streets, the chaos of the subway and the endless opportunities. I wanted to be with you forever. I didn't know what it was, but it seemed as though I had left a piece of me with you.
As time passed, I realized why I felt this way. I was somewhere that never slept, and I felt invincible when I was with you. It seemed as though I could go and follow every single dream I have without worrying about lack of opportunity. The idea of disappointment never crossed my mind; it was as though not succeeding was not an option. I’m a firm believer that I am not alone in these feelings. Others have received the urge that comes with the idea that you can do anything and be anyone with you in their lives. From the brokers to the writers and everyone in between, you feel like home. The idea of taking this with me kept me awake at night. There had to be something I could do to bring home the feeling one receives when standing on your streets.
In the end I realized that I could never recreate you, and that was okay. If I could bring you somewhere else, you would no longer be yourself. So thank you for the memories. Thank you for giving me hope for today and a place to spend future. Until next time, New York City.
