They say, there are two things you are guaranteed in this world: life and death. I wish that made it easier, but it doesn't. If you're reading this and you're one of the few people to have never experienced loss, count your blessings. You are so damn lucky. For the rest of us, this is for you.

I know how you're feeling. There's a pit in your stomach, your eyes may be puffy and red from the tears and your heart is heavy knowing they will never make you smile again. You're angry this happened and maybe mad at yourself for not making more time for them. What you would do for just one more visit, one more holiday! It's not fair.

I promise you, no matter how it happened, it's never fair. It's not fair to lose someone so quickly, without time to prepare, and it's not fair when you had weeks in hospice, watching the life slowly slip away from them, day by day. Loss is hard. It's probably the hardest thing I've ever had to experience. Harder than taking AP tests or swimming in a championship meet or picking a major or finding a job after graduation. .

The hardest thing to accept is change. That the person you love is no longer with you. And at first, it's terrible. Their voice comes into your mind, and suddenly you have to leave the room before you break down. You drive by their favorite place to eat, and you can't imagine ever going there again. The loss is everywhere. In your parents, in your siblings, in your family and friends. Everyone's sad, or feels sad for you. You cannot imagine life ever being the same.

And, I promise you, it won't. But it'll be a new same. The thing about loss, is it brings people together. It makes families appreciate each other that much more. Almost 12 years ago, I lost one of my grandparents. My mom is from Lima, a small town north of Dayton. During the weekend of services, we all stayed at my grandparents house, the house my mom and her three siblings grew up it. That's one grandma, four brothers and sisters, their significant others, and nine grandkids, living under one roof. As sad as the situation was, being together like that has to be one of the most vivid memories I have growing up. The chaos, playing with all of my cousins and just being all together for more than a Christmas afternoon was something I will never forget. Spending that time together brought my family closer.

Losing someone opens your eyes a little wider. You'll start to appreciate what you took for granted before. You'll appreciate the people you have a little more. And soon, when their voice comes to your mind, you'll smile, and remember how it made you feel. You'll go to their favorite place to eat, just to feel a little piece of them again. The pain turns to memory, and the memories begin to bring a bit of happiness.

We are days into 2016, and I've already seen devastating loss happen to friends and my local community. Nothing can make it easier, but know people are thinking of you. I'm thinking of you. Others understand what you are going through. Lean on your family like you never had before. Know that you are not alone. The person you lost is right there within you.

Another thing they say, is that time heals all wounds. I'm not sure I totally agree with this, but I know it helps.