Dear Mom and Dad,
I understand that many things change when your children go off to college. For some, their family moves to a smaller house, since they don't need as much space. For others, their family gets a puppy to replace the hole that their children left. For some bizarre reason, however, in my case, you both just carried on without me. You claim your love for me hasn't changed, but I beg to differ, considering you have neglected to keep me a part of the family.
It's not entirely your fault. Since I am the oldest child, you haven't figured out how to adjust when it is time for us kids to leave home, so I am the guinea pig.
The first thing I lost was my bed. My nice, fluffy, full size bed went right to my sister. I came home to her bunk beds in my room, and you thought I wouldn't notice. More room for activities you claim, but we all know you had this plan worked out well before I moved out.
The second thing I lost was my car. Conveniently enough for you, my sister started driving when I went off to school. When I came home for Christmas break, I was stranded in the house all day because she got to take it to school. When she wasn't at school, she was at work. When she wasn't at work, she was with her friends. Do you realize the mental anguish I went through when you had to drop me off places in the mini van, as if I was still in middle school?
The next thing I lost was your constant nagging phone calls. I know I used to complain about them, but now you don't call me at all. All I wanted in high school was for you to leave me alone, rather than always needing to know exactly where I was. I realize now that it would be nice if you would call me every once in a while just to make sure I'm still alive.
The worst of all of the things that I have lost is the privilege to go on family vacations. I can't remember going on a single spring break cruise when I lived at home, and you decide the year I move out is the perfect time to start? Did you forget that I do actually come home for a month in December, and three months over summer? You could have planned the family vacation during any of that time so I could join. Clearly the vacation part was more important to you than the family part.
I don't ask for much (except occasionally for gas money, clothes money, food money, recreation money, etc.) but I would appreciate it if I was still considered a part of the family. From all the family photos taken on the cruise, I know how much fun you had without me. Could you at least crop me in? I personally don't think it will be very funny when the Christmas Card says, “not pictured: Lauren."
XOXO,
Your neglected 3rd child
