Dear isolated college student,
We’re starting a new year, new semester, and new classes, but you still seem to have one thing that has remained the same as the semester and year before. That one part of life that has not seemed to improve even after all of the freshman help seminars is still leaving you feeling like you're missing out. You may feel that way because you feel like you’re missing out on some of the most precious days of your life. You may feel that way because you don’t have that one person to call or text, besides your mom, that can share your excitement about a hilarious situation that just happened in your Tuesday afternoon class. That one part that could make such a huge difference is having that one dear friend.
We all long for one friend to be there for us during the major highs and all of the lows that we endure throughout life, especially in college. No one ever imagines going through their undergraduate years alone and in isolation. Sure, you’ve heard some encouraging lines from those who have come before you saying that it’s normal to only have one or two “good ones” by your side, but everyone seems to be overlooking the student who seemingly has no one by their side. You occasionally speak to classmates while in the dining hall for lunch and dinner but none of those casual conversations have resulted in a friendship that you desperately long for on the inside.
The consecutive weekends being spent in your dorm room, scrolling through Instagram seeing the pictures of others with their friend groups may leave you feeling as if you’re not good enough or that people don’t want to be bothered with you but that is not the truth. You are a beautiful soul that has not yet been discovered. That discovery may not have happened yet because of other people, or it may also be because you have not recognized your own light and strength from within. You are brilliant beyond the million dollar textbooks that we have to buy for classes and you are also rarer than one of those minerals scientist go crazy over discovering. Whether this is your freshman year, senior year, or if you are a transfer student new to the grounds of your university or college, you should know that isolation is not your ending.
There will come a time when your phone will ring because on the other end is a lifelong friend squirming to share the bubbling news with you and not your mom calling to nag about making sure you are washing your clothes during the weekend. As you wait to develop these relationships, be proactive by intentionally joining different organizations and finding the very things that make you happy. Your years in college are not defined by how many selfies and Snapchat stories you have that feature multitudes of people but they are defined by you leaving your mark. Go out onto campus and let that flame that you have been discovering shine unapologetically.
When you meet these friends, cherish them but do not feel neglected or hurt if they happen to also have other friends outside of you. Be secure in yourself and abilities during this season in college, even though it can get hard due to the stress and straining demands of performance at your institution. You are not alone even though you feel alone, but isolation is not your ending. Isolation is only your beginning and you will flourish even when you feel that you just cannot make it. I am here to encourage and remind you that this moment, no matter how long it may seem, this too shall pass.
— Kay
