Recently, my sorority sisters and I played a game. We got in a circle, turned off the lights and our New Member Coordinator spoke. If what she said applied to us, we stepped forward without judgment. Every person stepped forward when she mentioned low self esteem. It broke my heart to hear so many smart, beautiful and kind-hearted girls thought the way I did. This is to every girl who has felt like this.
Dear Old Me,
I know you. Someone can tell you over a thousand times that you’re wonderful and you won’t believe it. You’re stubborn that way. Change that. Don’t let the boy who doesn’t text you back till the middle of the night make you feel like this is all you deserve. Get rid of that friend who lies to you.
I know you feel like you’re not pretty enough. I know you don’t feel confident in a bathing suit. I know you look at other girls and think "why can’t I be more like her?" I know your struggles of not being good enough for the expectations that are placed on you. I know how it feels to be afraid to show who you are because someone has called you annoying before. The truth is, every girl feels this way or has at some point.
Don’t hide who you are. I spent so much time thinking that I couldn’t act a certain way around my friends because they wouldn’t accept me. Don’t be concerned with who won’t like you and be more concerned with who will. Don’t ever not sing at the top of your lungs because you are afraid people will judge you. Dance in spite of your two left feet.
Kick that guy to the curb. Maybe your prince doesn’t have a sword or a handsome stead, but I promise a text saying “hey wyd, come cuddle” at 11:30 at night isn’t what Rapunzel had in mind when she let down her long hair. I know you think guys won’t take the time, or even like the real you, but the right one will.
Accept yourself. Every time you think something negative about your appearance, say two things that are nice. If you really aren’t happy, change it. But you have to fix the inside before you feel any different.
Stop settling for people and parts of your life that leave you empty. Your friends shouldn’t notice 30 minutes later that you haven’t said a word.
Don’t get in those moods. You know the one I’m talking about. The one that makes you feel like you’re completely and utterly alone. The one that can happen in the middle of a crowd and loneliness washes over you. Find friends who pull you from that mood. Laughter is the best remedy for it.
After coming to college, I realized I had wasted most of my life caring about what others thought and basing my self esteem on their opinions. I let my thoughts get clouded because I assumed no one knew where I was coming from. As a child, I was overweight. I'm not one of those girls who are naturally skinny. Being told that I needed to diet, watch what I eat, or even buying bigger sizes made me so embarrassed. I wanted to pretend like these things didn't affect me. I thought if I could act like I knew I was pretty, confident and smart… No one would know I was a mess inside. I’m done with that. Now I don't need to act. My low self esteem can't control me anymore.
