Remember those letters to yourself that you had to write in 8th grade for your future self to read and realize how much you'd changed? This is basically the opposite of that. These are all the things I wish I could go back and tell my seventeen/eighteen year old freshman self, and the things I would tell any incoming or current college freshman.
Just be yourself, even if you're not sure who that self is yet.
You are going to change your major, and your going to change it again. You are going to have different groups of friends who all do different things. You are going to wish you could be multiple places at one time. This is a whole new place with a whole lot of freedom and a whole lot of people your age. This is the time to figure out who you are, and that person can be very diverse. You don't need to pick just one interest, or just one group of friends. When you do that, you're forcing yourself to fit into that standard for that one thing, and you are more than just one thing. It's going to feel overwhelming, but that's okay. Follow whatever makes you happy, not what other people think makes you happy. These things may change, and that's okay too.
There are more important things in your life right now than parties.
I know, you just discovered this whole fun world that you never experienced in high school, and yeah, it's awesome. College is the time for this stuff, so live it up. Get dressed up, wear a costume or follow a theme, meet new people, do it all. But don't lose yourself or alienate friends in the process. It can be all too easy to live your life for the weekend, for the next big party, but you have to remember the things in between as well. Like, I don't know, that college algebra class you're failing, or those friends you barely see anymore because they don't party. Party, have fun and let loose, but don't get lost in it and make it the most important thing in your life. This is the time for making memories, but remember that those memories can come from anywhere.
Don't live your life to please anyone but yourself.
People are going to criticize you, be it about your major or your past or whatever else. I know, you're a people pleaser, and you hate it more than anything when you can't make someone like you, but it's okay. The only person you truly need to make happy is yourself. So what if your major isn't on the list of those that pay the most, it's what makes you happy. So what if you like going to parties, as long as it's not hurting you or anyone else. So what if your room is in a permanently messy state, it's a small room and you're the only one who has to live in it. Stop caring what others have to think, and just live your life for you.
It's okay to have feelings.
I know, I know, your whole life right now is being the #nofeelings girl. You're trying to live your life in an unemotional state so that you can be "free" and blah blah blah. Stop it. Seriously stop thinking that way. It's okay to have feelings, because if you keep yourself from feeling anything then eventually you are going to explode. It's okay to have feelings and it's okay to show them, to anyone. I know it's hard, you come from a family that doesn't give hugs and kisses or say "I love you" every time they see each other. It can feel awkward and stiff at first, but show people how you feel, they'll appreciate it. Show your friends, show your family, show the right person when they come into your life next year, just show them.
Your anxiety is real and valid, don't let anyone make you feel otherwise.
You have anxiety, and that's okay. Things might be a little (or a lot) harder for you than they are for everyone else, but you'll learn to live with that. Find whatever it is that helps you deal with this, and don't let anyone tell you that you need to "just relax." It's more complicated than that and you have to understand that. There's a difference between having anxiety and just feeling anxious sometimes, but not everyone understands that. Take your mental health seriously now before it's too late
Don't belittle yourself or let anyone belittle you.
No matter what, you are amazing. You got accepted to a great university. You left everything at seventeen years old to go and live independently in a new city. You are incredibly intelligent, and don't let anyone make you think otherwise (including yourself.) Try your best, but know that it's okay if you fail a class, or barely pass one that wasn't your best. It's okay if you're not as good at something as someone else, just keep going.
Don't compare yourself to others.
It doesn't matter what you're comparing, just don't do it. Yes, that girl you saw in the dining hall is totally gorgeous, but that doesn't mean you aren't. She might be thinking the same about you. Yes, that person did a lot better on that exam/paper/class than you, but that doesn't make them smarter or better than you. You might excel in a different subject which they don't. You can appreciate someone else's beauty/intelligence/life without comparing it to your own, because comparison creates jealousy and you do not need that. Be the best you, and help everyone else be the best they can be as well.
Now is the time to learn and to make mistakes, but just look out for yourself. You're going to screw up and screw up again, but so long as you learn from these screw ups and don't do them again, you'll come out of it better in the end. Freshman year is fun, and difficult, and completely unique to college and life in general. I'm here two and a half years later wishing I could do some things differently, but knowing that who I was freshman year helped me become who I am now and who I will be.
