Dear 5-year-old self,
I wish I could clearly remember the vibrant, young little person you are. Those were the easy times for sure... when skinning your knee or being put in time-out are the hardest of times. You are so young, innocent, and naive; you have no idea how much joy this life can give you while what deep pain it can cause as well. I sometimes find myself wanting to go back just for a moment to relive those moments of carefree, anxiety-less living. Remember how you couldn't wait to be an adult? When it felt like an eternity before you would even be 16 years old. Well your wildest, 5-year-old dreams have come true and it's (almost) nothing like you'd imagine.
One of the best moments of your life will happen at this age... And that is meeting Jesus. Many others come to know Him at different ages in their lives but that sweet prayer you prayed would shape the rest of your life. Be so thankful that you grew up going to church and learning those many Bible stories. They are really sweet memories to hold onto as an adult.
You're also going to go through many different stages with your parents. Right now, they might be your heroes and closest friends. Coming into your teenage years, you may not want to be seen with them in public because it's not the cool thing to do. Now, they are your support system, your mentors, your guides, and again some of your closest friends. It's totally normal to go through all these stages. Just cherish these fun times you have with them now.
This world is a pretty big place for you right now, but know that it gets even bigger the older you become. I know that you're scared of jumping off the high diving board at the swimming pool and being left in the house by yourself, but there are far more terrifying things this world has coming at you. I'm not trying to scare you, but teach you to allow your confidence to grow now. So don't be too afraid to ride your bike without training wheels. Even when you fall, I've learned that the pain and scars mold you into a stronger person.
You probably don't understand anything I would be telling you right now, and perhaps that's a good thing. You don't know that depression and anxiety will become some heavy burdens to bear in adulthood. You don't know what it's like struggle with body image and believing that you're not beautiful. You don't quite understand the pains of disappointment, anger, bitterness, and betrayal yet. However, you also haven't experienced the sweet closeness you will experience with the Lord. You haven't endured difficult trials that have led to precious victories in the end, which will be some of your most cherished life moments. You haven't met the cool friends that you will make fun memories yet... and even more fun than seeing Disney on Ice. Right now, embrace your free spirit and innocent life with no anxiety to hold you down.
I'm pretty sure you still think boys have cooties. And unfortunately, they still do. In all seriousness, you will one day actually like boys. You will run across nice ones and not so nice ones. Remember to not let the not so nice ones bring you down. There will be a day that even I am still waiting for when you'll end up with the nicest one of all (to you at least).
Most of all, always remember who you are on the inside. This world will try to tell you to be all sorts of things, but remember who God truly made you to be despite what people tell you. Remember the childlike faith He has given you now and that you can trust Him so easily at this point in life. Ultimately, remember the He loves and delights in you. Remember that you are dearly loved by many. One day, you'll be able to encourage others that didn't receive the love you have while growing up and that will bless you tremendously. Appreciate nap time while you have it because you're going to wish you had nap time when you get older. And, rock your natural curly-q's because you will straighten them to death in your teenage years.
So be very excited for growing up. It's more than what your little imagination could ever think up. Remember that you are a precious soul at 5, 15, 22, and even older.
With love,
Your 22-year-old, somewhat adult self
