For whatever reason, you’ve found yourself in a situation where you and your significant other can no longer see each other everyday due to either going to different schools, moving across the country, or a deployment. Your heart aches sadly at the thought of letting them go, but you know it’s the only option. You’ve only ever heard horror stories of long distance relationships, how they end up an ugly mess laced with jealousy, miscommunication, and anger. From these stories, breaking up seems like the only viable option. Yet, what if it wasn’t?
Sometimes in life, the world places the perfect person right in front of us. They seem to possess every quality that you want in a significant other, whether that be intelligence, a great sense of humor, or the unwavering ability to never fail at making you smile. Or maybe––if you’re really lucky, the world will give you someone with all of the above. If the universe has been so kind to give you this amazing human being, why should you let a few miles ruin something with the potential to make you happy for a life time? Of course, long distance relationships aren’t for everyone. There’s people out there who don’t want the weight of a relationship enabling them from exploring their options when they begin a new chapter of their lives. There’s also people out there who love a bit too extremely and become a jealous mess when their significant other so much as says hello to another person. So if you’re one of those people, long distance probably won’t work out well for you. But if you’re not, I encourage you to read on.
It’s going to be hard at first, I can tell you that much. You’re going from seeing someone almost everyday and spending all your spare time with them, to not seeing them at all. Luckily, with the technology available us today, there are so many ways to keep in touch with them. Texting, phone calls, and Facetiming are all great ways to keep the communication going and have it seem as if they’re right by your side albeit the fact that they’re many many miles away. Now I am in no way telling you to text your S.O from the moment you wake up to the moment you fall asleep. Unless you both enjoy talking all day over text, I wouldn’t recommend that. It’s important to remember that everyone likes a bit of space. Even if you’re completely head over heals in love with each other, it’s always nice to have a moment of silence and be alone with your thoughts. If you know your partner is going out with their friends, don’t spend the whole night on the opposite end of your phone blowing up theirs. If they’re out with their friends, make plans with yours. Just because you’re in a long distance relationship doesn’t mean you can’t go out and have fun. At the end of the night or the next day, it’ll be fun to swap stories of what you guys did the day before. I guarantee it.
As time wears on, not seeing them every day becomes a little easier. You’ll miss them like crazy, some days more so than others, but you’ll learn you’re not going to die without them by your side. There are going to be days where all you want is a hug from the only person who can’t hug you and those days aren’t going to be easy. What makes it easier is thinking about how amazing it’ll be the next time you see them. Because I can assure you that the saying “distance makes the heart grow fonder” is one hundred percent accurate. You learn to appreciate the times you can be together so much more and never take a second for granted. Yet you’ve got to make the relationship work to get to the good times and you’re not going to be able to do this without a little faith, trust, and pixie dust. Well ––hold the pixie dust and just focus on the trust part, because it’s vital. A long distance relationship is going to require the largest amount of trust you can muster. When you know your partner is hanging out with a person that you know is far too attractive for them to want to be “just friends” with, it isn’t healthy to stay up that night pondering all the bad things they could be doing. You have to trust that they’ll stay faithful, because that’s quite literally all you can do. But trust and faithfulness aren’t the only two fundamentals that come into play here, honesty plays a large role as well. If you find someone else that you’d rather be with, don’t you dare think for a second that cheating on your partner is the right option just because they’ll never find out. Be honest and tell them before you decide to pursue someone else. Honestly, it’s just the right thing to do.
If you’ve found yourself in a predicament where you have to decide whether or not a long distance relationship is worth it or not, I hope what I’ve written to you is somewhat of help. If the person you’re with is everything you’ve hoped for and more, don’t throw the love you have away just because you’re uncertain. As long as there’s trust, honesty, and communication, I can assure you that your relationship doesn’t have to go south just because you guys are no longer in the same area code.
Distance means nothing when the person means everything.
