I know the science of why you exist. I know oil and dirt clog pores inside the skin and that reaction spawns you. I also know I wash my face and use medicine to kill you every day. So, honestly I am confused as to why I still find myself hunched in front of a mirror everyday trying to squeeze the life out of you.
You are nasty, annoying and I would give anything for you to go away. It’s like a living nightmare having you around every day. I see magazines and media with you nowhere in sight. Pretty girls with sweet, clear faces. Why don’t I look like them? Why do they get the perfect skin? I’m supposed to “be myself” and live life, but how can I when you are controlling me?
Frankly, I don’t like you, acne. However, I won’t let you define me. My rocky mountain forehead, is my forehead. Your scabs will NOT take over my chin, because it is my chin. Overall, my face that you have decided to conquer is mine. It doesn’t matter if it is underneath all of your infected bumps. I will roll with the punches and take what you’ve given me with my head held the highest. I can beat you. I can go on.
I know that I am still going to give up sometimes. Maybe I won’t go to school because I’m too embarrassed to be seen with you, or I will spend hours trying to hide you with makeup. I’m going to cry because I feel ugly and I will probably forget that things will get better. Coming home and looking into the mirror after a day when I forgot about you and then remembering you are there could break me. But I will wash my face again, go to sleep, and wake up.
I love myself for who I am. It’s unfortunate that you are on my face, I’m sorry that you are there. However, I realize now that you are not what matters, I am. My spectacular self is way more noticeable than you. You are dull and unwanted, but I shine bright. People like me, I am beautiful.
I will keep fighting and striving for the day when you are gone, but for now I’ll still love what I’ve got.
My pretty face.