People feed off of each other.

The people you hang around become who you are.

And the people who hang around you, take on a part of your personality for themselves as well.

And this is awesome, interesting, even something kind of heart-warming. When I see someone start to use the same expressions I do, it makes me smile.

But this can also be flipped into a very negative thing - which is what I want to focus on right now.

Take this situation:

You are in a group of people, and someone decides to call a girl a "slut."

Disagreeing with someone's views is hard, especially if they are your friends. It can lead to anger, frustration, and mostly, I think, people, worry about it taking a toll on their perceived reputation.

You, a part of this group, decide to be neutral. You don't say yes, you don't say no.

Maybe you chime in with a, "Oh, really?" or a, "No way?"

Technically, you didn't agree with the statement. But you didn't disagree either.

The damage is still done.

This makes it easy for the whole group of people to agree, whether they really think this girl is hyper-sexual or not and for it to spread.

If one person says yes, and another follows, the next person will likely follow as well, and the next thing you know this entire group has collectively decided that this is the truth - Said girl must be a slut.

Next thing you know, a whole group of people has taken this negative view of an innocent girl to be true - and taken action as far as shunning this girl, making her feel lonely, unwanted, sad and confused. Not to mention her reputation has taken a hit for no reason other than this group acting out of ignorance.

Word spreads and this girl is now isolated as well as humiliated.

Now, if one single person had said anything at all, even the simplest of comments like:

"I don't know,"

"That doesn't seem right,"

"I don't think she seems that way,"

or, "Hey, chill out."

Not only would that have stopped the progression of this conversation in its tracks, but it forces people to step back and rethink what they are saying.

One person being brave enough to question a statement encourages others to step up and share thoughts they may have as well.

This can completely change the course of events.

This concept applies to absolutely everyone and everything. Some of the most common ways negativity likes to spread in the ideas of today's society are:

Women:

- being called a slut or a bitch

- not being thought of as smart, or not as smart as men

- called dramatic

- thought of as crazy and emotional

- feminism being a bad thing

- dressing a certain way being the equivalent of "sluttiness" or "asking for it"

Minorities:

- being portrayed as criminals, thugs, troubled

- less deserving than whites

- less intelligent than whites

- less capable than whites

- Stereotypes such as blacks being only athletes and the use of the N-word, Mexicans as cleaners or yard workers, Asians as only geniuses, etc.

- immigrants 'stealing' jobs, money, or opportunity

Homosexuals:

- being treated differently

- being feared

- thought of as gross, creepy (think, "omg he's gay what if he hits on me")

- males as "feminine" and females as "butch"

- isolating them

And these are only the topics that are the most relevant today.

This article is dedicated to an old friend, Connor, who referred to himself as "Guncle," short for Gay Uncle.

He was accepted and loved by many and gave love and positivity in return.

He was also continually taunted, teased, stereotyped, feared, and treated unkindly by ignorant people for his whole life. I remember some of my friends, who considered themselves to be more manly, would make fun of him and talk about how they wanted to stay away because they were afraid he would "come onto them."

This same wonderful kid is now gone.

This is not to say that the unfair treatment he received was the cause of his death, but death brings perspective, and I think everyone can agree that he did not deserve the treatment he received by people as a whole while he was alive.

I can not help but think back to those times I spent with him in high school and wonder how differently things may have ended up if more people would've taken initiative and stood up against the offensive comments that always circulated when his name would come up.

Life is precious, and everyone is human.

Taking a stand can be scary, but I think risking the way your friends perceive you (who, if they really are your friends, shouldn't judge your opinions, anyway) is easier than dealing with the unexpected loss of someone close to you.

We are all here, and we all have no more idea about what the hell we are doing here than the next.

But humanity is all made up of a soul that feels everything so intensely.

Why treat someone awful when we all know how hard it is to feel alone?

So, please.

Stand up.

Be the role model others look up to.

Be the person people can count on to stand up for them.

Be nice, be positive, be loving.

Be that one person.

Change starts with you.

*In loving memory of Guncle. I will do everything in my power to treat others better than you were treated, and to spread the message you have taught me both in life and in death.*