A co-authored article with Savannah Behrmann.
The following article contains very personal emotions and opinions from a sexual assault survivor who wishes to remain anonymous. Please read this piece with this in mind.
While college campuses have increased their motivation to both pursue the assailants of sexual violence and raise awareness about the issue, women have constantly become just numbers or statistics, lost in public outcry and rage. These “statistics” are women and men. Numbers and percentages may work for general awareness, but they oftentimes dehumanize the survivors of sexual assault and remove the public from the individual occurrences themselves.
Women are criticized for not coming forward, but maybe their criticizers are the ones not taking into account the emotional toll that sexual assault carries. Many women do not report their sexual assaults due to the fact that they either are afraid or don’t want sympathy.
We, as both supporters and survivors, are more than a statistic. We are college students, we are daughters, and we are survivors. We are more than a statistic; we may be one in four, but we can no longer let numbers haunt us. It is critical to address that the staggering number of women who are sexually assaulted cannot go unnoticed, and it is equally important to recognize that these women are more than numbers.
Many of these women are college students, fellow classmates, sisters, and close friends. Sexual assault does not discriminate, and there should be no shame in admitting what you have overcome. There should be no stigma or doubt towards these women. The difficulty in overcoming a tragic event such as sexual assault after one has come forward is not eased by doubtful questioning or excessive attention from others.
Among all these statistics, we commonly hear that roughly four out of five assaults are committed by someone known to the victim. What this number doesn’t tell you is that a woman was raped by her classmate who she now has to sit beside, or even one of her boyfriends. Every 107 seconds, an American is sexually assaulted. What if that was your daughter, or your mother, or even your brother? That number suddenly has been given a face and a name, and it isn’t a pleasant reality to comprehend.
I was once told that, “We define ourselves by the best that is within us, not the worst that has been done to us." After speaking openly about their sexual assaults to either psychologists, family, or friends, many women find that they feel as though they have the tools they need to overcome their obstacles and move on from their assaults. No one should be limited to their traumatic experiences or haunted by another’s violence. Survivors are not only capable of outstanding resilience, but they also should mean more to you than just a statistic.
If you or anyone you know has been a victim of sexual assault, abuse, or rape, please contact 800-656-HOPE (4673) or visit online.rainn.org to speak with a RAINN member for help. Many colleges also offer counseling and are open to students, please take advantage of the resources that are provided to you by your University.
