5 Numbers That Don't Determined Your Self Worth

5 Numbers That Don't Determine Your Self-Worth

Stop counting, start living.


How many hours a day do we spend second-guessing ourselves based on numerous external factors? We focus on materialistic things or ideas that fluctuate from person to person and then we compare. Instead of focusing on the negative, we can realize what factors bring us down and focus on erasing those out of our lives to thrive in a much more positive, soul-filling environment.

1. Your GPA

Don't get me wrong. Grades are important! However, stop putting yourself down over a bad grade every now and then or a lower GPA than your friends. Just because you aren't on the dean's list doesn't mean you aren't putting in just as many hours in the library as anyone with a 4.0. Focus on doing your absolute best with your academics and the rest will fall into place. Give yourself a pat on the back too. Whether it's high school or college, you're out there doing the dang thing!

2. Your body weight

Bodies come in all shapes and sizes. This means that we all carry our weight differently. Weight is not solely based on what you eat whatsoever. You have to consider height, bone mass, and even genetics. Instead of concentrating on the number of a scale try to visualize the overall picture of your health. Aspire to be the healthiest version of you by eating a balanced diet, inhaling some good old fresh air, and caring for your mental health with things like yoga and meditation.

3. The size of your clothes

Say it with me ladies and gentleman: sizing is inconsistent! It is far too easy to go into a dressing room with one size in mind, and feel defeated when that size is too snug. I have had countless dressing room nightmare stories. I used to be humiliated to ask for the next size or two up in anything I was trying on and it became exhausting. It was always a mental battle to go try on clothes for me which is never how shopping should be. A size 10 could fit much more like an 8 in one store and a 12 in another, it all depends on the brand. Don't let a number get in the way of shopping and expressing your style. Some of my favorite "sizing friendly" stores include Aerie, Express, and Old Navy.

4. Amount of Instagram likes

This is something that is a struggle for a much wider range of people than we would like to admit…myself included. When so many social media "models" and "influencers" are being thrown in our faces all day as we scroll through our feed it can be tempting to base our validation off of our own social media accounts. How many followers do I have? Why am I not getting as many likes on this particular photo? Who is viewing my story and what did they think about it? The social media train of thought is endless. Try to fill your feed with accounts that feed your soul instead of making you question your own self, such as positive body image influencers.

5. The people in your friend group

As somebody who came from having 10-15 best friends in high school and spent her first semester in college with just two or three. I know it can be tough feeling like the number of your friends is low. It can make you feel lonely or even unpopular. However I learned quickly that it is never about the number of your close friends, but the quality. Cheesy, but true, right? Surround yourself with even just one best friend who has your best interests at heart, who will go on spontaneous adventures with you, and who will be your biggest cheerleader. It is more satisfying to have this rather than dozens of people who only care half of the time. Choose to have the people in your life that want to be there for you, not who you have to beg to show up.

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To The Girl Struggling With Her Body Image

It's not about the size of your jeans, but the size of your heart, soul, and spirit.


To the girl struggling with her body image,

You are more than the number on the scale. You are more than the number on your jeans and dresses. You are way more than the number of pounds you've gained or lost in whatever amount of time.

Weight is defined as the quantity of matter contained by a body or object. Weight does not define your self-worth, ambition or potential.

So many girls strive for validation through the various numbers associated with body image and it's really so sad seeing such beautiful, incredible women become discouraged over a few numbers that don't measure anything of true significance.

Yes, it is important to live a healthy lifestyle. Yes, it is important to take care of yourself. However, taking care of yourself includes your mental health as well. Neglecting either your mental or physical health will inflict problems on the other. It's very easy to get caught up in the idea that you're too heavy or too thin, which results in you possibly mistreating your body in some way.

Your body is your special, beautiful temple. It harbors all of your thoughts, feelings, characteristics, and ideas. Without it, you wouldn't be you. If you so wish to change it in a healthy way, then, by all means, go ahead. With that being said, don't make changes to impress or please someone else. You are the only person who is in charge of your body. No one else has the right to tell you whether or not your body is good enough. If you don't satisfy their standards, then you don't need that sort of negative influence in your life. That sort of manipulation and control is extremely unhealthy in its own regard.

Do not hold back on things you love or want to do because of how you interpret your body. You are enough. You are more than enough. You are more than your exterior. You are your inner being, your spirit. A smile and confidence are the most beautiful things you can wear.

It's not about the size of your jeans. It's about the size of your mind and heart. Embrace your body, observe and adore every curve, bone and stretch mark. Wear what makes you feel happy and comfortable in your own skin. Do your hair and makeup (or don't do either) to your heart's desire. Wear the crop top you've been eyeing up in that store window. Want a bikini body? Put a bikini on your body, simple.

So, as hard as it may seem sometimes, understand that the number on the scale doesn't measure the amount or significance of your contributions to this world. Just because that dress doesn't fit you like you had hoped doesn't mean that you're any less of a person.

Love your body, and your body will love you right back.

Cover Image Credit: Lauren Margliotti

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Stand In The Mirror

An exercise in self-love.


If you're reading this, then I want you to stop what you're doing right now, get up from wherever you're sitting, and go stand in the mirror.

Yes, that's right. Close your laptops, put down your phones, and walk to the closest bathroom, or vanity, or wherever else you can see your reflection the most clearly. Pretend like you're the only person in the world for a little while.

Are you there? Good.

Now I want you to look at yourself, very closely.

Start with your eyes. How beautiful they look underneath the light; you can see all their colors, just like a painting! Something that unique belongs in an art museum, don't you think?

Those eyes of yours have seen so many wonderful things. Think of all the sunsets they've allowed you to witness, all the times your best friends have grinned from ear-to-ear and all the books you've read.

Now, look at your lips. Think of all the lovely people they may have kissed, all the Thanksgiving dinners they've touched and all the funny faces they've helped you express.

Think all of the times they've opened to exude laughter and joy, to express awe and other associated feelings words cannot express.

Now it's time to examine your arms. Shrug your shoulders and admire the way they fall so gently at your sides, like water flowing from the mouth of a river. Think of all the wonderful things they've helped you to reach, of all the trees they've helped you climb and monkey bars they've helped you swing through. Think of all the people they've hugged, and all the dogs they've helped you pet.

Finally, move to your legs. Think of all the races they've helped you win, all the hurdles they've helped you jump through and all the lengths they've helped you swim.

Think of all the pristine places they've carried you to, and reflect upon all the places you'll soon be heading to.

Can't you see now that you're a masterpiece, dripping with color and beauty, emotion and experience, from every fiber of your being?

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