No one is a harsher critic than yourself, and that’s something I’ve especially learned since I got to college. You see, coming into this, I thought it would be a breeze. High school certainly was for me. Looking back at those four years in high school, I really thought that I knew it all, and I thought that college would just confirm this. Obviously, as any student who thrived in high school can tell you, college is a whole different ball game.

Not only is there more responsibility in general in terms of classes, but there’s so much else to take into consideration that I just didn’t have a clue about. Having the right schedule, having a good adviser that you actually trust (not just the person they assign you to when you first arrive), the financial responsibilities. Half of these things I didn’t even realize would be some of the biggest stresses for me, yet here I am in my fifth year of college, probably banking on a sixth.

I’ve dealt with my fair share of struggles during my time at college, and I still continue to deal with them. I’ve watched my best friends that I began college with graduate and go off into their “real adult” life (whatever that means, because the way I see it, no one is ever a true adult, especially not my friends). I’ve given myself countless scheduling problems due to bad advice and because I didn’t do my research thoroughly enough. I’ve lost friends. I’ve made mistakes. I’ve gone through a bad relationship and ended up on the other side. I’ve blamed others for things that I’ve done, and I’ve taken blame for things I definitely shouldn’t have.

And yet, I don’t regret a single thing that I’ve done here.

I look back to my high school self and I see a scared, sad girl with a closed-mind that was afraid to move on from her little town. I even almost transferred to a college closer to home after less than a semester at West Chester because I was so unbearably afraid. Of what? I’m not really sure. Maybe it was the thought of being independent for the first time in my life, or maybe the changes that were bound to happen within me. I think growing up inherently scares everyone.

But staying here in this open-minded environment, getting to know the people that I’ve met and allowing them to influence my life, I’ve grown up more than I could ever imagine. I’ll look back and remember some of the things that my high school self said and just cringe, because I was insensitive and ignorant to so much back then. Gender, sexuality, politics, relationships, and even more honestly. Coming to college has truly changed me and made me a better person, and I think that that’s more important than getting the grade and graduating in the end. Taking my time throughout the journey--being sure about my decisions and what I want to do, having fun with my friends while I can, just enjoying my time here--will make me appreciate it more when I’m old and gray. I never want to look back at my college experience with any regrets.

So, am I where I thought I’d be? Where I want to be? No, absolutely not. But I'm where I need to be. And that’s what truly matters in the end.

Life isn’t a sprint to the finish line, it’s a maze. There are twists and turns, there are traps that will catch you, there are detours you’ll take, and so much that you simply won’t see coming. Everyone goes through it differently. There's no correct path or set time limit. So take a breath, take your time, and take the plunge into it. It’s okay to not know what you’re doing. It’s okay to not be where you thought you’d be. And it’s okay to not be okay sometimes. I’m learning that every single day.